O carte pe care am citit-o cu mare plăcere și foarte ușor, dar care mi-a revoluționat oarecum modul de a privi un mariaj. Aș pune-o în mâna tuturor oamenilor de pe planeta asta și i-aș forța s-o citească, ca să fiu complet sinceră. Cele cinci limbaje ale iubirii de aici nu se aplică numai relațiilor de cuplu, ci mai tuturor relațiilor interumane. De iubit, nu ne iubim doar soțul/soția și atât. Ne iubim membrii familiei, copiii, prietenii, etc. Mi se pare o carte foarte importantă, iar ceea ce o face și mai mișto e faptul că e foarte „citibilă”. Cum ziceam, am citit-o din plăcere și destul de rapid. Mi-a plăcut mult și o recomand mai departe! :)

جميل إن كتب أخر السنة تكون لطيفة كدا
الكتاب بيتكلم عن إن كل شخص فينا مختلف عن التاني في طريقة تعبيره عن حبه و بالتالى فكل واحد ليه لغة حب مختلفة بيحبها و بيستناها .. قسم لغات الحب لخمسة :
- كلمات التشجيع
- قضاء وقت سوا
- أعمال خدمية أو مساعدة
- تبادل هدايا
- إتصال بدني
و من هنا بيبدأ يشرح كل لغة بالتفصيل و يدي قصص من خبراته..
فكرة الكتاب لذيذة .. طول عمرى كنت باخد بالى إن اللى بيفرحني مش هو اللى بيفرح غيري .. أو على الأقل مش بنفس الدرجة.. بس في نفس الوقت مش قادرة اقتنع إن كل واحد ليه لغة حب واحدة .. يمكن فعلا فيه حاجة بتكون مسيطرة عن التانية لكن في الآخر كل واحد فينا فيه لغات الحب بنسب مختلفة .. السر كله إنك تركز على الأهم ..اللطيف إنه مش بس متكلم عن الأزواج لا كمان عالسريع اتكلم عن الصحاب و الأطفال .. خصوصا فكرة إن الطفل اللى بيحتاج كلمات تشجيع مثلا أو أحضان و احتواء و هو صغير و بيكبر فجأة ميلاقيش ده كله فبيحس إنه مش محبوب حتي لو اتقدمله مليون حاجة تانية و هكذا
يعيب الكتاب بالنسبة لى التكرار و التبسيط الشديد جدا جدا كأن اللى بيقرأ مش فاهم حاجة

من أروع و أهم الكتب التي قرأتها .
كتاب سهل وواضحة أفكاره جدًا ، ويتضمن الكثير من الأمثلة و التجارب الحقيقية ، والتي تقرب الأفكار بطريقة ممتازة .
هو كتاب مهم لكل شخص ، لأنه لا يقتصر على الحب بين الأزواج ، بل يمكن تطبيقه على الحب الإنساني بكل أنواعه و أشكاله .
أنصح الجميع بقراءته ، حتى لو لم يكونوا واقعين في الحب أو متزوجين .

A nice audiobook to listen to while doing something else: soothing and practicable enough, but not at all difficult or overwhelming.

As for the message itself, I found it totally valid, but oversimplified. The premise is that it's not enough to love anybody in your own way; one must show one's love in a way that speaks of love to the other person. So, in one of the examples, a man was doing all the house chores as a way of caring for his wife, and she thought that he'd rather do anything than spend some quality time with her, so all of this effort was misplaced because she didn't really feel loved.

This is the idea; then the good doctor identifies five love languages and urges us to find out (by observation or just by asking) what is our loved one's main one, and then practice 'speaking it', i. e., doing the things the other person wants us most to do, instead of what we think they should appreciate or just what we ourselves would enjoy being done for us.

All of this is quite valid and practicable. I asked my husband about it and he gladly named his two prime 'love languages', although of course, he didn't want me to give up on the other three altogether, since it would be nice to have some of that, too. That's all good, but when I came to think about my own 'love language', I realized it's not in the book. For me, feeling loved means feeling understood and accepted, - and this is something quite different from quality time (sometimes an act of love is to leave me alone and let me do whatever I'm doing) or words of appreciation (which are just words and don't matter that much to me). And since mine is not in the book, I'm thinking there might be others; and in this case, just following the method of the book will not work.

But if one abstracts away from these particular love languages and just stays with the idea that it's important to know how your loved one wants to be loved, and that it's OK to just ask them about it, — I'm certain this will do a world of good for any relationship. I think the very fact of asking such questions, like, 'What would you like me to do to show my love' is a very nice way of showing that you care.

But then again, maybe you and your loved one will be quite OK with choosing one of the suggested love languages and need not bother about there being any others.

I am careful about saying 'loved one' instead of 'partner', because this can be applied to anybody: one's children or, say, dogs. One of my dogs wants to be left alone, and the other wants to be the centre of attention; you can see how important it is to be discriminative.

So, a nice useful book that might not change your life, but might very well improve your understanding of your loved ones.

Yes, and I forgot to say: the book has some Christian overtones, but for me, they were quite easily ignorable.

This book made me cry, because it made me realize how little I have felt loved during my life, especially during childhood.

Although I am single, and not currently in a relationship, I read this because I wanted to learn more about love.

The book has its flaws, but the majority of the information in it is good and useful for anyone that wishes to develop a deeper understanding of of love.

Chapman has written a singles’ edition. I may eventually read that.

Chapman reads the audio well.

I borrowed the audiobook and ebook from my library. The ebook was a very different version from the audio. This was annoying, but not a deal breaker. Be forewarned that there are many versions of this book.

Don't let the ridiculous cover fool you! This is the single best book I've ever read to help me understand the different ways people show love and wish to receive love. This book absolutely helped me to understand and improve my marriage. I have recommended this book many times and was shocked to see I have never reviewed it. In fact, it is probably time for a reread.
The Five Love Languages of Children is also excellent. 5 stars!

If I could give this book less than 1 star, I would. It supports abusive, toxic, sexist relationships and I am unconvinced that Dr. Chapman cares about women as human beings.

When my partner and I began this book, we were really excited. The principle of the book, is great. It begins by saying that it's important to learn the love language of your partner to ensure you are loving them to the fullest. But from here, things get very murky before dipping into a black hole never to return.

As the book goes on, it becomes apparent that Dr. Chapman doesn't understand his own premise, ESPECIALLY when he talks about physical touch and acts of service. He makes claims that physical touch isn't just about sex and acts of service isn't just about domestic duties, but then he only uses examples of these love languages as that. Every man depicted in this book is an awful, lazy, toxic male who only wants sex and expects everything to be done for them. Though Dr. Chapman makes a passing comment about how gender stereotypes are harmful, he then makes sure that women understand that all they should be are robots. Women are supposed to cook and clean and have sex and never EVER complain if their husband is mistreating them. His basic undertone is: if you're being abused, it's because you're not loving him in the way he needs.

Dr. Chapman finishes the book by encouraging a wife who is clearly and undeniably being abused by her husband, to stay with him and attempt to fix their marriage on her own. Dr. Chapman suggests that she should have sex with him regularly because that's what Jesus teaches, and as a result, he may come to love her again. She confides that when they have sex, she feels used because every other time they are together he ignores her. Dr. Chapman uses the bible and manipulative language to essentially convince her to 'take one for the team'. And let's also not ignore the fact that when he gives her this awful advice, he constantly refers to it as an experiment and that it is blatantly obvious that he's more than happy to make her circumstances worse so that he can then cash in by seeing her more regularly.

My final remarks for this book is actually something my partner said when we finished. We agreed that wading through that book was like shovelling s**t out in the yard, it's not nice but at least you're together. Quite frankly, after finishing this book I can say I would've rather spent that time outside shovelling s**t than supporting such an awful man's work. Do not buy this book and if you do, for the love of God, don't listen. Women, it is not our role to be domestic slaves - acts of service has nothing to do with domestic duties because they should be shared equally. And there is no question about it, if your partner is abusive, leave.

"پنج زبان عشق" رازهایی برای داشتن عشق پایدار است که توسط دکتر گری چاپمن نوشته شده است.
چاپمن در این کتاب 5 زبان متفاوت عشق را معرفی میکند و از مخزن عشقی سخن به میان می آورد که خالی بودن و خالی ماندن آن مساویست با مرگ تدریجی خانواده!
شاید شما هم به افزایش بی رویه آمار طلاق فکر کرده باشید..
شاید  این موضوعات دغدغه و ترس خیلی از جوانان مجرد یا متاهل باشه! طلاق ، طلاق عاطفی ، سست شدن بنیان خانواده و...
ریشه همه این مسائل در  این هست که زبان عشق طرف مقابل رو یاد نمیگیریم و نمیتونیم به زبان عشق اون ابراز احساسات کنیم ، در نتیجه مخزن عشقی که نباید خالی باشه ، خالی میمونه و بعد از مدتی منجر به جداییِ رسما یا قلبا میشه!
و این یعنی فاجعه...!
چاپمن این کتاب رو برای متاهل ها نوشته اما بعد از یاد گرفتن این 5 زبان به نتایج عمیقی رسیدم و علت بسیاری از مشکلات اخلاقی کودکان رو هم کشف کردم..

من اهم الكتب التي تناولت موضوع الحب بشكل عقلاني وباسلوب ممتع بنفس الوقت
انصح الجميع بقرائته


(لو كان بإمكاني لسلمت نسخة من هذا الكتاب لكل زوج و زوجة في هذه البلاد واقول له لقد كتبت هذا الكتاب من اجلك, وامل ان تغير حياتك , واذا استفدت منه اعطه لشخص اخر وحيث انني لا استنطيع فعل هذا فسأكون سعيداً اذا اعطيت هذه نسخة من هذا الكتاب لعائلتك , ولاخوانك و أخواتك , وكذلك لابنائك المتزوجين , ولموظفيك, ولرفقائك في النادي , ومن يدري ربما يمكننا أن نحقق أحلامنا )

People have already said it, but I'll reiterate: overrated, overly-simple, heteronormative, sexist, and unexpectedly very Christian themed (bible versus included). It's common sense relationship advice wrapped in a Bible-read-along bow. Blah.

Interesting, insightful, useful. Good dinner conversation.

The author is a Baptist church pastor who counseled thousands of people. As a result he discovered what he called the Five Love Languages. It works as follows.

One should figure out what their love language is - which may be different from their spouse’s language. A person tends to do things for their spouse that they would like done for themself, but that won’t please the spouse if the spouse has a different language. For example, the husband might desire words of affirmation (needs to hear compliments and appreciation for his work). The wife might desire acts of service (like help with household chores). If the marriage has problems, one should try giving the spouse what the spouse desires - periodically and regularly.

The other three languages are: physical touch, spend quality time together, receive gifts.

This also helps with other relationships like friendships, family members, and co-workers.

AUDIOBOOK NARRATOR:
The author narrated his book. It was well done.

AUDIOBOOK:
There are several different titles for this book in Goodreads. The one I purchased was on Audible. The title was “The Five Love Languages: The Secret to Love That Lasts.”

DATA:
Narrative mode: 1st person. Unabridged audiobook length: 4 hrs and 46 mins. Swearing language: none. Sexual content: none. Book copyright: 2009. Genre: nonfiction, self help psychology, marriage counseling.

I would never have read this book on my own but was urged to read it after a debate with a friend of my roommate. It's written by a marriage counselor and directed towards couples, but it can be applied to all relationships, both romantic and platonic. The author's theory is that there are five major ways to express love (the five love languages). Each of us has a primary love language, and relationship problems occur when others fail to express love to us in that language. It's an interesting theory but WAY oversimplified, and I was extremely bothered by one of the real life stories where the author encourages a wife to stay with an abusive husband and rescue their marriage by learning his love language. That's crap! The book is written from a religious perspective, and I struggled a lot with that as well. Overall, I wasn't so impressed, but I did conclude that my love language is Quality Time, and I've been surprised by how much insight that has provided into how I operate in relationships. For that alone, it gets two stars instead of one.