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This is a pretty dense book. Though I think I took notes… I'm still not sure what purpose this talking to my future self serves when I'm pretty sure about where I need to be going and such.
But… I do use the what's better list every day.
The concept of this is pretty simple:
Your subconscious thinks in present, positive tense. Which means that any goal you want to write must be written like this: I am a person who can do 100 push-ups in a row. (Of course, I'm not yet, but the point is that that is how the goal is written.)
To make this even awesomer, you rewrite the goal and add your awesome feelings at being able to do this goal: I am a happy, healthy person who can do 100 push-ups in a row. I feel like I could also run to the moon and back, but that's a different goal, and— I'm so happy I'm monologuing!
And, to make sure it sticks in your head or something, you also write your present reality: I am a healthy person who can do only 5 push-ups in a row. :(
Once you've done that, you also start a "What's Better?" list. Updated at the end of each day or throughout the day, this is a list of what's better (what 'better' is open to interpretation) for each day. You can use it for specific projects by setting a challenge for yourself to write one good thing about nails every day, thus exponentially increasing your chances of thinking positively about your nails… and hopefully not biting them because of it (I think it works?).
There's also a little bit about 'treating problems as friends,' which means that instead of being annoyed, you try to figure out what this problem would tell you if it was a friend of yours, something like, "Sweetie, the fact that you are so sore you cannot do 6 push-ups means you are working yourself too hard. Try doing 4 push-ups at a time instead. Don't stretch yourself more than you can bounce back."
Then there's a whole lot of stuff about creation, which honestly was a bit weird even for me, who made it through most of the book. Basically, "M'dear, life is a work of art. If you have a messy desktop, it's because you created that messy desktop. And because it's art… it's PERFECT the way it is." I have problems with this because… I don't like messy desktops. But that's fine. I can choose to tweak my art.
And, at the end, there's a nifty step-by-step thing that gives you tips to how to start this on your own.
Now, how do I use this book?
- I write a 'what's better list' every day. If I skip it one day by accident, I fill in from memory. (The past few days, whenever I want to quit my Scrivener app, where I keep all this stuff, I keep remembering cool things that happened that day. It's annoying, but also good.)
- I use the goal-setting method.
What don't I do?
- I don't self-coach every day. Yes, I should according to the book… but at some point it goes from 'I need help with this' to 'this is what I'm doing today (cool!) yes, I'm going to work now (alright) bye (bye)', which isn't something I particularly like. Maybe I just need to reread the book. Again. Maybe then I'll figure out what it is I'm supposed to be doing.
In conclusion… this is a great book. Very useful. And it's unique in the way that it's written (as self-coaching exercises).
You may not like this book if you're not into:
- Talking to a future self of yours
- Writing lists about positive things that happened to you
Otherwise, give it a try! You'll most certainly take something away.
But… I do use the what's better list every day.
The concept of this is pretty simple:
Your subconscious thinks in present, positive tense. Which means that any goal you want to write must be written like this: I am a person who can do 100 push-ups in a row. (Of course, I'm not yet, but the point is that that is how the goal is written.)
To make this even awesomer, you rewrite the goal and add your awesome feelings at being able to do this goal: I am a happy, healthy person who can do 100 push-ups in a row. I feel like I could also run to the moon and back, but that's a different goal, and— I'm so happy I'm monologuing!
And, to make sure it sticks in your head or something, you also write your present reality: I am a healthy person who can do only 5 push-ups in a row. :(
Once you've done that, you also start a "What's Better?" list. Updated at the end of each day or throughout the day, this is a list of what's better (what 'better' is open to interpretation) for each day. You can use it for specific projects by setting a challenge for yourself to write one good thing about nails every day, thus exponentially increasing your chances of thinking positively about your nails… and hopefully not biting them because of it (I think it works?).
There's also a little bit about 'treating problems as friends,' which means that instead of being annoyed, you try to figure out what this problem would tell you if it was a friend of yours, something like, "Sweetie, the fact that you are so sore you cannot do 6 push-ups means you are working yourself too hard. Try doing 4 push-ups at a time instead. Don't stretch yourself more than you can bounce back."
Then there's a whole lot of stuff about creation, which honestly was a bit weird even for me, who made it through most of the book. Basically, "M'dear, life is a work of art. If you have a messy desktop, it's because you created that messy desktop. And because it's art… it's PERFECT the way it is." I have problems with this because… I don't like messy desktops. But that's fine. I can choose to tweak my art.
And, at the end, there's a nifty step-by-step thing that gives you tips to how to start this on your own.
Now, how do I use this book?
- I write a 'what's better list' every day. If I skip it one day by accident, I fill in from memory. (The past few days, whenever I want to quit my Scrivener app, where I keep all this stuff, I keep remembering cool things that happened that day. It's annoying, but also good.)
- I use the goal-setting method.
What don't I do?
- I don't self-coach every day. Yes, I should according to the book… but at some point it goes from 'I need help with this' to 'this is what I'm doing today (cool!) yes, I'm going to work now (alright) bye (bye)', which isn't something I particularly like. Maybe I just need to reread the book. Again. Maybe then I'll figure out what it is I'm supposed to be doing.
In conclusion… this is a great book. Very useful. And it's unique in the way that it's written (as self-coaching exercises).
You may not like this book if you're not into:
- Talking to a future self of yours
- Writing lists about positive things that happened to you
Otherwise, give it a try! You'll most certainly take something away.
