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Another engaging story from Richard Russo, following my previous review of Empire Falls. This one is filled with humor. It's truly an academic novel, revolving around a 49-year-old professor (mid-life crisis perhaps?) at a lower-tier university, maybe a branch campus, in a bypassed town in Pennsylvania. He belongs to the "sandwich generation" with a wife he loves, who is a school principal, and two daughters. One married daughter lives in town, and they worry about her financial situation and the possibility of her being in an abusive relationship. His mother also resides in town, and there's talk that his father, who is separated from her, may be moving back in. The main character's father haunts the book like a ghost and doesn't make a personal appearance until the end of the novel. His father was a "celebrity academic," well-published, constantly on the move with visiting professorships, and always accompanied by an attractive female grad student. First, about the town, Railton, which is described as being "divided by the tracks into two unattractive halves." Church Street has lost all six of its churches. Yet, the faculty stay because "We quickly learned how much more it cost to live in places where people actually wanted to live." The main character happens to be the English department chair for a year, not because he is especially well-liked or a talented administrator, but simply because it's his turn and the faculty view him as the lowest common denominator they can agree on. He is both anti-union and anti-administration, making enemies on both sides. He treasures his wise-ass reputation (hence the book's title), surviving on cynicism and the disparagement of almost everything and everyone. Anyone who has been in academia will appreciate the accuracy of what Russo criticizes. The faculty is one of inertia and lost opportunity; some didn't finish their doctorates or their books; a few could have gone elsewhere years ago but didn't; now they are trapped in this small world of mutual bickering and disgust. Here are some examples: Russo calls it an "atmosphere of distrust, suspicion, and retribution." We all know the quote attributed to Henry Kissinger (although many said it before him) about academic politics being so vicious because the stakes are so trivial. I also think of Stoner in John Williams' novel where his chairman held a grudge against him for twenty years over a trivial matter. Regarding the endless faculty meetings, he can't remember the last time anyone changed their mind as a result of all the reasoned discourse; in fact, it seems as if the discussions only further entrench everyone in their original position. All hiring procedures are dominated by political correctness. One young male professor with a ponytail corrects everyone's generic "he" so frequently that they call him "Orshee" behind his back. The main character loves it when someone says "We're all reasonable people." His response is: "Name ONE!" The main character published one novel 20 years ago, which his former chairman always referred to as his "collected works." The faculty union rep tells him: "I know you think we [the union] defend incompetence, promote mediocrity." To which he replies: "I wish you WOULD promote mediocrity…[it's] a reasonable goal for our institution." When it comes to the latest rumor that financial exigency will lead to the administration cutting tenured faculty, he says: "[Not] unless the faculty are going to be invited to drink Jim Jones Kool-Aid after the donkey basketball game and then buried in a mass grave." A significant portion of his vitriol is directed at his ever-absent, pompous father. The problem with the title "Distinguished Visiting Professor" is that "...it's hard to remain distinguished among people who know you." His father received two attractive offers that led him to take a job at Columbia U; one from the university for a full professorship, and one from a young woman graduate student. Regarding his father's best-selling book of literary criticism, he remarks that "everyone buys it, displays it, discusses it, without finding the time to actually read it." A grad student corrects papers in his father's large class, but he grades papers from his tiny seminar himself. "That is, he placed a letter grade on them and for all anyone knew may even have read them." Other passages I liked include: "…two people who love each other need not necessarily have the same dreams and aspirations, but they damn well ought to share the same nightmares." His younger daughter, "the least thoughtful but the most outspoken of his three feminists" (wife and two daughters), says "Menstruation always was the real red badge of courage." "Rachael [his department secretary] is one of the half-dozen women on campus with whom I have to work at not falling in love." "His mind was simply voided, as if the thoughts in his head were composed of iron filings and he was standing too close to a magnet." All in all, it's great humor, a very good read, and an accurate snapshot of the academy. Russo was a faculty member at Southern Illinois and at Colby College, Maine. I'm giving it a 4, not a 5, because the humor, unlike in Empire Falls, sometimes degenerates into farce, almost slapstick. Still, it's highly recommended. Photo of Richard Russo from wikipedia