I love Maddox's website, and my expectations were quite high for this book. Unfortunately, I was let down.

I only managed a chuckle from 'A is for Ass-Kicking' and 'U is for Urinal Etiquette.' The rest of the book feels like page after page of forced hyperbole, as opposed to the natural and free-flowing hyperbole normally found at thebestpageintheuniverse.com. That would be forgivable if the book at least brandished Maddox's trademark cleverness, but it was not to be found. Not even 'N is for Norris, Chuck' could rescue this bad boy. Like all of the entries in this book, Maddox skipped over clever and surprising wordplay and went straight to uncrafted extremeness. The subtext was, "Hey, isn't this way over-the-top??? Doesn't that make it funny???"

Over-the-top humor only works if its crafted in such a way that the viewer can't predict what's about to happen. I am disappointed to report that there were hardly any jokes or even moments that felt anything other than stale and forced.

What a terrible book this was. It's basically a how to manual on how to do retarded stuff that no one cares about. It's a shame because Maddox's website is pretty fantastic. He ignores what he's good at (ranting about current issues with a satirical chauvinist spin) to give step by step instructions on subjects that are boring (how to cop a feel on a woman and get away with it). Who doesn't know how to grab a random boob every now and again?



1. Go to concert.



2. Stand behind a person who is standing behind a girl.



3. Reach past person and grab girls boob.



4. Look straight ahead. Don't make eye contact.



Really? We need you to write that in a book? I don't know. I guess I expected more from the guy who had the balls to call Chris Reeves a selfish bastard for raising money for research of the disability he had. I understand that writing a book about things that are currently happening can hurt future sales for a book because it can become dated pretty fast, but if writing generic mindless shit is the alternative, I wish he'd just stuck with what he does well.

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In hindsight, the fact that my abusive ex is the one who recommended that I read The Alphabet of Manliness by Maddox is a clear sign to how utterly terrible this book truly is. I recall, at the time, feeling bad that I disliked so much this book that he had suggested I read. Then again, a good majority of his recommendations turned out to be terrible reads. It's just more to tack on to the list of things I regret about that relationship, I suppose. Reading this book is definitely something I regret.

What amazes me about this book is that it's meant to be humorous in some way. My entire experience with it, though, is ultimately disgust and hatred. The Alphabet of Manliness is basically a book that supports toxic masculinity and sexual assault. I don't recall once thinking anything in this book was funny, insightful, or good.

Supposedly the author is funny. Supposedly he has a website that provides readers with amusing and worth-reading ideas. After my experience with this book, though, I am very skeptical that such a thing could be true.

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My husband had this and loved Maddox's stuff when he was a little younger, and while some of it was... riiiiiight, as soon as I shut off the part of my brain where my IQ was stored it was actually kind of amusing. Couldn't really read it all in one sitting, so I read a page or too while on the toilet. Captive audience, you see. Some of it was kind of funny, aaaand some of it kind of meh. Not sorry I read it, but glad I didn't pay money to do so.

"This is one book I am so glad I picked up becuase it was one of the most entertaining books I have ever read. It wasn't meant to be taken seriously as I can see that but more to make the reader smile. Now I understand everyone is different but for me, I couldn't help but laugh at some of the chapters - divided by letter - like the one on Chuck Norris and especially the one which had Socrates in it talking about being married and if she is good, you'll be happy and if she is bad you become a philosopher then showing a pencil-drawing of the inside of Socrates's wife's vagina being a cold snowstorm. Laughed at that.

This is one of thos novels that is great as a bathroom stall read or a ""King of the Throne"" read since chapters are small and they are hilarious. I think anyone - those with an open mind - would enjoy this book because it is not supposed to be taken seriously or I believe it is not supposed to be taken seriously. Some of the chapters could be a little over-the-top or maybe a tad bit off hilter but it is okay for the entire book as a whole is great. I suggest this book to be placed right in your restroom in front of the toilet because anyone taking a number two who sees this book will definietely pick it up. Trust me, I did twenty-six times."

This is just a hilarious, macho guy book that is unapologetically misogynistic with the knowledge that he is a total d*%k. Read it with an ironic, tongue in cheek perspective and you will laugh. And then you may kiss Chuck Norris ring of a unicorn with an enourmous schlong. For a progressive guy who cooks, shares the housework and took Feminist Theory because I actually thought it was interesting, this was a guilty pleasure kind of read for making me laugh at all the things I knew were just SO wrong.

I bought this because the cover was ridiculous and it sounded way over the top. It was. After reading it, I feel like more of a man than I have ever been... Someone hand me some soap, it's kinda gross being a man, maybe I can scrub some of this off of me.

If you can't tell from other reviews or even just the intro, this is not for the faint of (social) heart. Feminists who read it might develop random ticks. Here's the thing, you have to be able to take a joke if you want to enjoy this. Mr. Maddox is working overtime to push negative masculine stereotypes to their limits and for me it was hilarious. I might not be good for his reputation, but I would guess that writing some of this probably made him flinch at times.

On a side note, I was worried for a moment that someone might read this and actually agree with it, but really I don't think those people do a whole lot of reading so I don't think there's anything to worry about.

A fun little read. Some of his ideas and stories were ludicrous but I did enjoy his tone throughout the piece. He had a very informal, fun tone that made this book exciting to read.

As I sit here eating a steak with beer, have a Jon Wayne movie on in the background, my girlfriend doing the dishes, and am reading this book, I cannot help but feel that I cannot get any manlier.

If you enjoy Maddox's website, then you'll enjoy this. It's laugh out loud funny if you can take a joke without getting easily offended. This book should be on every man's coffee table.

The first entry under A (for Ass-kicking) is a diagramed review of the proper techniques for delivering a cock-punch. That should tell you what you need to know whether this book is for you. I found the evolutionary development of the lumberjack to be particularly enlightening. Good, but lost its zing as I read it in a single sitting.

Warning: this book can be offensive ... So if you don't like sexism and dick jokes this book probably isn't for you ... But if you want to be enlightened how most of the population lives their life.. Please by all means read on... My only complaint is other than the chapter for the letter 'J' which should of been about jerking off... Guess the editors couldn't let that one fly.. Everything else gives a good chauvinistic condescending tone to be expected, from 'ass kicking' to 'zombies' this book covers what it's like in essence to be all that is man ...

I can't in good conscious rate this more than 3 stars though .. Was amusing though

I want my time back