...
Show More
If I were John Banville, I'd be tremendously proud to find my masterpiece resting a mere two million places below Fifty Shades of Shite in the Goodreads rankings.
#arrived
#arrived
n
"...how could you go and leave me like this, floundering in my own foulness, with no one to save me from myself?"
n
n
"You live in the past."
n
n
n "The past beats inside me like a second heart...
"It was like encountering an old flame behind whose features thickened by age the slender lineaments that a former self so loved can still be clearly discerned."n
n
n
n "From earliest days I wanted to be someone else."n
n
n
n "Anna, I saw at once, would be the medium of my transmutation. She was the fairgound mirror in which all my distortions would be made straight...
"Henceforth I would have to address things as they are, not as I might imagine them, for this was a new version of reality."n
n
The silence about me was heavy as the sea.n nSitting by the sea, I am trying hard to evade the embrace of camphoric memories that hover schemingly, stroked by the amorous waves. Often this colossal sapphire vial of solitude, seduced by a flicker of cuprous sky or a kiss of the timorous breeze, changes colour and instead of heaping balms of comfort, loathes me with a vision so sharp that a part of me detaches with a vile force and travels into the dense, supine but thorny gardens of bygone land. And then begins a passionate journey between these two warriors who might belong to the same clan but having grown under two vastly different masters, have acquired their traits – past and present do not let any pupil off easily.
Has this not always been my aim, is this not, indeed, the secret aim of all of us, to be no longer flesh but transformed utterly into a gossamer of un-suffering spirit?n n