This is a easy to read book with eye-opening material. It focuses on the five love languages: words of affirmation, quality time, receiving gifts, acts of service, and physical touch. It is specifically written for men to help them learn to recognize their own love language and also their wife's. It gives tips on how to communicate the love language to create a happier marriage. I was about halfway through the book when I realized that this is men's edition and I am not a man. Haha. However, I still enjoyed reading it. It helped me understand how men struggle with love languages because it was written in a mans perspective and for men. One of the books strengths is that it included personal stories of the applications of the love languages. There is a quiz in the book to help you figure out you and your spouses love language. Throughout the book, there are also lists of things to do to speak your spouses love language. I think this is helpful to the reader because they can actually see how to speak someones love language in practical, everyday things. This book also helped me realize that my love language is "receiving gifts." I think I can recognize others love languages easier now that I have read this book.

Holiday Reading 2010

My desk is famous gathering point for family friends and colleagues to park lot’s of things, and whilst it’s sometimes just where people abandon things for me to put away after they use them, it’s also where people put things they want me to give attention to! It occurs to me that this book was in the latter category! One theme, multiple books, seminars and marketing campaigns latter and I tend to approach it from the perspective of a cynical Brit. I shouldn’t have. It’s a well written book, an easy and a quick read. I won’t make sensationalist claims about it saving marriages or changing mine, even though there is much I should be learning. This book should help me continue in doing that. My own hobbyhorse would be to say that it majors on presenting a cross cultural missionaries skills set. That is, realise that something you do with one meaning in your own frame of reference and values, is often read by others very differently, or perhaps to be without meaning. The challenge is to communicate to others that our different to you, your message in a language they can most easily embrace and be touched by…. And which may mean doing so in a way that didn’t come naturally to you until you started to better understand who the person or people that you are trying to communicate with.

The contents is actually quite "yes I actually know this" when you read it, but in reality, you never think about it, and it does matter. I needed to read this to get over past issues, and prevent future ones, it helped a little with understanding some things.

When does trying to help others become a money grab. Fortunately I don't have to make that call and can appreciate that any book that helps people communicate is worth reading. I think the 5 languages books are very good and helpful in understanding what motivates people.

To oversimplify this book pay attention to your spouse.  Try to love them in the ways they want to be loved not in the ways you want to love.  It is easier for men to acts of service.  We don't mind taking out the garbage or getting the oil changed.  But if she really wants quality time as Chapman points out over and over again you aren't filling her love bucket.  

throughout this book, Chapman goes over the 5 languages of love

Receiving Gifts
Physical Touch
Acts of Service
Words of affirmation
Quality time
Sometimes people may react stronger to more than on of the languages.  You will have to work on this test out each one for a while and see what works.  I believe Chapman's idea here is great because you have to listen to your spouse.  You have to learn who they are on the inside, and you have to spend time together figuring out which language works best.

Every married (or engaged) man needs to read this book. I plan on reading it yearly to keep me reminded of the core teachings about the ways that I love my wife and the ways she feels loved.

I looked this book and was glad it was available at my library (the original was not). I don't think I need to read both of them. It's interesting to get an understanding of this perspective from the source. I still am not confident I can detect a love language. There are several tests he recommends but I look at those and ask how many are dual love language tasks, like holding hands is touch and quality time. Is doing chores together acts of service and quality time? I feel like this could be a foundational step for couples in terms of speaking the same language, but I wouldn't limit myself to the constraints of the book. If s couple had something they like to do together, I think that's the important thing, not the question of which love language is it. And got finding future things to do together, I'd look for things similar to those that work and not necessarily just the love language.

You know what, this is a great book serving as an introduction to emotional intelligence for (primarily) men and others who may have not learned these things in the past. I don't think I have a primary love language (which he kind of explains) but this gives so many great ideas to help affirm relationships.

I am not quite sure how I ended up with this book, but thought that I should read it, so I did. It seems to be fairly consistent with the same ideas express in a bit better detail. I think it adds to compassion and understanding. The path to love is not easy, and yet it is rewarding.

This book gives clear information on the importance of the emotional impact of love and five ways that love can be communicated. He focuses mainly on couples but it is relevant to any relationship that is important to you. In the first three chapters chapters he explains the development of a relationship. "Falling in love" is the initial stage and brings people together but this is really not love that lasts. Although we think it will last our lifetime. He later explains how love is a choice, not just an emotional reaction. Love requires work and commitment to another. He explains the concept of the "love tank". When we receive love the tank remains full. When we do not "feel" love, receive love the way we like to receive love, the tank gets used up - depleats and we do not feel loved. He explains five ways (languages) love is communicated: words of affirmation or appreciation, spending quality time together, giving gifts, acts of service, and physical touch. In a couple each person may have a different primary way of experiencing love. Example: If the person identifies words of praise or affirmation as love but receives acts of service (doing the dishes) that does not seem to register as an act of love.
I think this book is a good way of identifying the ways you want to relieve love. There is a short questionnaire at the end if the book to give you a hint.
I am reading several books on love to create a course for groups who want to grow in love and in love relationships. This is my second book.

I previously read the original version "The Five Love Languages" and loved it.

This version is specifically written with Men in mind. There's a lot of repeat information in here, and if you're like me and you really like points being driven home, then you'll be ok with this. There's also some specific guidance for Men provided, which I also found useful. Unfortunately, there is no current version for Women.

There are additional sections covering how to deal with Anger in your relationship, and the Art of the Apology. I feel like these are pretty valuable sections that were not included in the original version that I read. Likely the best part of this read.

I feel that if you've read the original version of the book, then you do not likely "need" to read this one. If you're looking to add some flavor to the original, then I would recommend picking this one up and rolling through it. Between the two, I would recommend the original over this version as I feel like it speaks to everyone, and having a full rounded perspective is pretty important.

Conversely, this might be a good read for Women in relationships/marriages as well. Perspective is everything.

Written for men. Read by a woman to understand her man. It was a good quick read and written w love for all of out there doing our best to love someone but failing, whether in their view or our own view.

I still don't know his love language. I've read the love languages before and I know my type and I've talked w my man about this but he won't say his type! Is that a type indication right there?

He says his type is not in the book. He wants me to listen better (which is a struggle having ADD and his not believing in it) and I'm doing my best. As far as I can tell its quality time (listening during a conversation is giving him my undivided attention) and if I go w what he complains about, its that and how he likes a clean, orderly home and things done the right way. I'm guessing that's acts of service.

Good luck figuring your mate out. I sure wish he could figure out mine, words of affirmation. Wish he would talk to me, tell me his type, tell me encouraging words so I know how I'm doing in loving him.

Btw - a suggestion in the book is to list your top 10 happy memories as a couple and its not only given me insight into how I liked to be loved and what he has done for me that's been meaningful and touched my heart, but its also helped me focus on the good and realize how great a guy he is when I fail to see it everyday. I'm hoping he will list his happiest so I can see what makes him feel loved!