I don't think I'll be reading more books from the author, not because she's not a good writer. On the contrary, I think she does amazing work with how she draws a myriad of emotions from readers. But while I adore deep love stories, I'm not a fan of books full of twists and sorrows like she often writes about. I also don't love the doubts they've been putting in my head.
On that note, this book was definitely VERY twisty, taking us through possibilities, pulling us back from them, and then making one of those possibilities reality in unexpected ways.
I don't know if it's because I've had a fairly straightforward life, but I feel like books like these make the Christian life feel full of pain and uncertainty. Despite trusting God, Kari just goes from one terrible pain to the next. And it almost gives this impression that God uses his children's lives to play. Kari has no time to heal before the next hard thing is thrown at her, and she's told'my grace is sufficient for you'. Each time I have to remind myself that this is the author's doing and not real life. (Although you should read the author's note yourself to decide on this). Because as Christians we're taught that God doesn't like his children suffering and that our pain is his. But these books seem to show otherwise—even though it might not be conscious to the author.
I feel torn because this is really good storytelling. And based on the series success, she's a writer that has her readers hooked. There are also places I found more understanding about the Christian faith and some Bible verses I loved. I liked characters like John and Elizabeth—they remind me of my mom's love and sharp instinct with her children—and Ryan. The book was interesting enough to keep me reading to the end. It had a lot of good going for it. Based on these qualities, I'd give it a 4.5 stars.
But on the aspect of the message and themes, I'm leaning to a lower rating.
{Spoilers}
A lot of women suffer cheating in their marriages and still stay with their husbands anyway. So Kari staying with Tim isn't anything new. What's different for me is the extent Tim went to humiliate her. Moving in with the mistress like a shameless fool (pardon me), and constantly telling Kari to give him a divorce. Often when the husbands cheat, once they're caught, they (supposedly) get remorseful and beg forgiveness. In that case, I suppose it's a bit easier to forgive and get through it. But Tim kept pushing for a divorce and shaming Kari. That makes it hard to swallow that God will still want Kari to endure the humiliation. Then again, the author says this story was divinely inspired so maybe it's possible, I don't know. I'm just speaking from my 'unmarried girlie opinion'.
The author didn't make Tim possible to root for… at all. His physical description was the type that makes you wonder what Kari sees in him. Then his behavior was so sleazy, dating a student ten years younger. Even toward the end when he and Kari reconciled, he kept calling HIS infidelity 'our issues'. “You all know the issues Kari and I faced last month…”. Instead of “You all know the unfair ways I treated my wife...”. He made his faults an 'us' thing, and that doesn't show a man who feels truly guilty or is owning up to his faults. This part frankly didn't feel divinely inspired, but like the author's oblivion to how selfish Tim sounded.
I think I understand God wanting Tim to be redeemed before he died, but Kari having to endure Tim's horrible unfaithfulness and forgive him, and then have her husband die just when she'd accepted him back into her heart, gives the impression that God constantly puts his children through pain for external reasons. It's the same with One Tuesday Morning. Jake died, and in doing so Jamie knew God and Jake made those around him know Christ just before they all died. But that was him again suffering for other people—losing a chance to see his daughter grow and leaving his beloved wife heartbroken. It's just as how Jamie suffered through losing Eric only to help Eric be a better man to his family. I don't know if this is how Christianity really works, but I find that packaging it this way in books feels discouraging both to new believers, and unbelievers trying to decide if to accept Christ.
It puts a fear in me, honestly, that as a Christian there are great trials ahead just waiting. I've always known life isn't perfect and that being a Christian doesn't magically make it so. But these books feel like Christians responsibility is to suffer great anguish, and it gave me real anxiety recently that I had to talk to my family about.
In a way, while I wait on God to answer a long-running prayer point and the wait has been virtually agonizing, I've found some comfort in reading this and knowing that the wait and the pain of it has a purpose. But compared to what KK's characters go through, my own pain and wait feels like child's play.
I could go on and on. But basically, I have both admiration for the storytelling, protests, and annoyance in equal measure. So I couldn't quite tell you how I feel about this book. (Again 3 stars isn't my real rating; I can't decide on a rating and just had to put up something). But I definitely recommend a read IF you like twisty, non-straightforward books that you can also learn from.