Community Reviews

Rating(4 / 5.0, 95 votes)
5 stars
32(34%)
4 stars
35(37%)
3 stars
28(29%)
2 stars
0(0%)
1 stars
0(0%)
95 reviews
July 14,2025
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This book was extremely beneficial to me when it came to handling several personal matters in my life.

I had the wrong perception that being a Christian meant one had to be a pushover for those who were abusive. However, this book enlightened me and taught me that genuine love is actually strong.

It showed me that with real love, one can set boundaries with confidence.

It made me realize that I didn't have to tolerate mistreatment just because I was a Christian.

This new understanding has empowered me to take control of my life and relationships, and to stand up for myself in a loving and assertive way.

I am truly grateful for this book and the valuable lessons it has taught me.
July 14,2025
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This book is truly a hard one to read, and it presents a significant challenge in light of my current situation.

The complexity of its content and the way it is written make it a rather demanding read.

I find myself having to constantly stop and think, trying to fully understand the author's intended meaning.

It seems that I will likely need to read it again in order to gain a more comprehensive understanding.

The first time through, I may have missed some important details or nuances.

By reading it a second time, I hope to be able to better grasp the overall message and apply it to my own life and circumstances.

Despite the difficulties, I am determined to persevere and make the most of this reading experience.
July 14,2025
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Wow.

This was truly the ideal moment for me to be perusing this. In all honesty, any time would have been splendid. However, I'm currently delving deep into learning how to apply these concepts, and indeed, it has been truly remarkable.

The content is extremely rich in truth and solid substance. It was both convicting and validating. I found myself tearing up regularly, and that epilogue!!

It's one of those books where, upon finishing, you immediately realize that you didn't fully grasp all the wisdom it holds. Yet, you have so much within you that you're about to burst, and there's so much more to discover!! It's definitely a book worth rereading.

Allender presents his message clearly, and he has a very significant message. He understands the essence of love and represents it beautifully.

Seriously, if you are involved in any kind of relationship whatsoever, you absolutely must read this book.
July 14,2025
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This is the best and most helpful book that I have ever come across.

It is not a light read by any means. Instead, it is filled with numerous practical truths that can have a profound impact on one's life.

The author has done an excellent job of presenting these truths in a clear and understandable manner.

Each chapter is filled with valuable insights and real-life examples that make it easy to apply the concepts to one's own situation.

Whether you are looking to improve your relationships, your career, or your overall quality of life, this book has something for everyone.

I highly recommend it to anyone who is serious about making positive changes in their life.
July 14,2025
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One of the most practically impactful books I've ever read is this one by Allender.

In this book, Allender endeavors to shatter our cultural misunderstandings of love and delve deep into the core of what love truly is.

He starts by establishing the foundation of real love and then proceeds to explore why that kind of love is so arduous.

Moreover, he guides us on how to navigate a path of love in our lives, even in the midst of pain, offense, and bitterness.

The first two-thirds of this book are outstanding.

However, what had the most profound impact on me was Allender's third section.

In this part, he utilizes the Proverbs as signposts to teach us how to love three very distinct types of people: the mocker, the fool, and the sinner.

This section is filled to the brim with unique and godly wisdom.

I highly recommend that you read this book.

Your soul will undoubtedly benefit greatly as Allender is certain to both inspire and challenge you.

July 14,2025
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Goodness gracious. What a beautiful, difficult, convicting, enlightening, hopeful read this was.

I have never before read such an all-encompassing view of Christian love, forgiveness, and reconciliation. Allender's approach to writing is much like his advice in the book: it is compassionate, firm, and it pinches a nerve to a point where you desire to turn toward holiness.

This book is particularly convicting to me, especially when dealing with my good ol' Southern passive aggressiveness. He leads the reader to understand that Christ calls us to love people boldly. We should not pursue them with mere politeness and accept them without desiring to see their sin destroyed. Instead, he suggests that we should pursue them with truth. The hope is that when hurt occurs, true reconciliation and restoration of the relationship can take place. One of his main points is that love cannot be "polite" because politeness would not allow the honesty that is required to point people toward holiness. It is a beautiful exposition of what Christian love and forgiveness should look like.

I would highly recommend this book for any Christian. Whether you are simply occasionally hurt by snide comments from your roommate, or you have been severely abused for years, this book will help you comprehend what forgiveness looks like for anyone who has hurt you, and why it is necessary for the Christian.

It offers valuable insights and practical guidance on how to live out the principles of love and forgiveness in our daily lives.
July 14,2025
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I've read this book countless times.

Learning how to love boldly is indeed a lifelong challenge that requires continuous effort and growth.

However, I have noticed a significant improvement in my relationships ever since I started implementing the teachings and principles from this book into my daily life.

It has opened my eyes to new ways of understanding and connecting with others, allowing me to express my love more freely and authentically.

The book has provided me with valuable insights and practical tips on how to build stronger, more meaningful relationships based on trust, respect, and mutual understanding.

By applying these lessons, I have been able to overcome my fears and insecurities, and embrace love with an open heart.

Overall, this book has been a game-changer for me in my journey of learning how to love boldly and has had a profound impact on my relationships.
July 14,2025
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Don’t Agree with Much of His Approach

While his basic thesis of reconciliation being the result of yearning for restoration, revoking the desire for revenge, and giving good gifts is sound, I found myself disagreeing with many assertions in his book. For instance, he seems to overly simplify the complex process of reconciliation. In reality, it is not just about these three aspects. There are numerous other factors at play, such as the nature of the conflict, the personalities of the involved parties, and the social and cultural context.

Moreover, his claim that giving good gifts is a crucial element in achieving reconciliation is rather one-sided. While gifts can sometimes help to ease tensions and show goodwill, they cannot substitute for genuine communication, understanding, and forgiveness.

In conclusion, although the author's basic idea has some merit, his approach to reconciliation is too simplistic and fails to take into account the full complexity of the issue. I believe that a more comprehensive and nuanced understanding of reconciliation is needed.
July 14,2025
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There is a great deal of good within this book.

However, ultimately it fails *VERY SHORT* in the sense that it ultimately endorses (promotes) conditional love and conditional forgiveness.

Allender has produced better works elsewhere, far better in fact.

And there are numerous other much better works on love available.

For instance, Brian Zahnd's Unconditional, Paul Miller's A Loving Life, and Ed Welch's Side by Side, just to name a few that come to mind immediately.

To discover other more helpful books, refer to my book summaries under the category of DOING.

These other works offer a more profound and comprehensive exploration of love and forgiveness, without the limitations found in this particular book.

They provide valuable insights and practical guidance for those seeking to understand and experience love in a more unconditional and meaningful way.

It is important to look beyond this book and explore the rich literature available on the subject to gain a more complete understanding of love and its true nature.

July 14,2025
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Love is a profound and complex emotion that goes beyond mere niceness or avoiding the hurt of someone's feelings.

It means having the courage to put another person's well-being at the forefront, even if it requires difficult decisions or actions.

I truly wish that I had learned this important lesson earlier in my life.

Hindsight is always 20/20, and looking back, I can see how many opportunities I may have missed or relationships that could have been deeper and more fulfilling if I had understood the true meaning of love.

Love is not always easy; it often demands sacrifice and selflessness.

But when we have the courage to love in this way, we open ourselves up to a world of possibilities and experiences that can bring us great joy and satisfaction.

I am determined to carry this new understanding of love with me and to apply it in my future relationships and interactions with others.

July 14,2025
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I only skimmed this article.

Skimming is a useful technique when you want to quickly get an overview of the content.

By skimming, you can identify the main ideas, key points, and important information without reading every word in detail.

It helps you save time and decide whether the article is worth reading more thoroughly.

However, skimming has its limitations.

You may miss some of the finer details and nuances that are important for a full understanding.

So, it's important to use skimming in conjunction with other reading strategies, such as scanning and close reading.

This way, you can get the most out of the article and gain a comprehensive understanding of its content.

Overall, skimming is a valuable skill that can help you be more efficient in your reading and learning.
July 14,2025
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This is truly the best resource that I have managed to come across for spouses who have a strong desire to love well even during the most difficult of times.

It offers a wealth of valuable insights and practical advice that can help couples navigate through the stormy seas of life and maintain a deep and meaningful connection.

Whether it's dealing with financial stress, relationship conflicts, or personal hardships, this resource provides the tools and strategies needed to strengthen the bond between spouses and keep the flame of love burning bright.

It emphasizes the importance of communication, understanding, and forgiveness, and offers tips on how to express love and appreciation in meaningful ways.

Overall, this is an essential resource for any couple who wants to build a lasting and fulfilling relationship, especially in the face of adversity.
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