الطريق الأقل ارتيادا

في هذا الكتاب يضع الاخصائي النفسي مورغان سكوت بيك خلاصة تجاربه ليقدم ارشاداته للطريق نحو النمو الروحي. انه يتحدث عن المعاناة والمسؤولية والانضباط والحب شارحا تأثيرات العلاقة مع الآباء في الطفولة على المراحل التي تليها في الحياة، وكيف يقدم العلاج النفسي حلولا تبدأ من قبول الانسان لمبدأ التعب والألم من أجل تجاوز ضعفه والنمو بروحه.

في فصل الانضباط يقدم فكرة ان القبول بمبدأ ان الحياة هي معاناة هو السبيل للتوقف عن الشعور بالألم. يتحدث عن الاعتراف والالتزام بمسؤولية الفرد عن حياته، وكيف يمكن ان يقع الناس في خطأ الهروب من الاعتراف بهذه المسؤولية او تحميل انفسهم اكثر مما يتحملون مسؤوليته فعلا. يتحدث عن الاضطرابات النفسية المختلفة وعلاقتها بما حظوا به من محبة في الطفولة (الحرمان، او حتى الحب الذي يمكن وصفه بالمريض) ويتحدث ايضا عن العيش في الواقع والسماح بتجديد صورة هذا الواقع بحسب المعطيات الجديدة (في مقابل العيش في وهم).

في فصل الحب يعيد تعريف الحب ليكون ذلك السعي/الجهد الذي يهدف فيه الانسان للنمو بروحه او النمو بروح شخص آخر. يتحدث عن الوقوع في الحب وكيف يمكن ان يكون الوقوع خارجه هو الخطوة الاولى نحو علاقة روحية اشد عمقا. يتحدث عن الاستقلال بصفته الايجابية، عن التضحية غير المجدية في الحب، عن أن الحب يتعدى كونه عاطفة/شعور، وعن المخاطر التي يمكن ان يأخذها الناس للوصول الى مكان افضل ��ي علاقاتهم (خطر الفقد، خطر الاستقلال، خطر المواجهة).

في النصف الثاني من الكتاب يتحدث عن علاقة النمو الروحي بالدين، وعن معجزة الله ومحبته وعلاقة ذلك بالنمو الروحي والنفس.

وجدت الفصلين الاول والثاني أكثر تأثيرا بالنسبة لي، والكتاب حافل بقصص وشواهد من الحالات التي مرت به لتعزز الافكار التي يقدمها.

“If your goal is to avoid pain and escape suffering, I would not advise you to seek higher levels of consciousness or spiritual evolution. First, you cannot achieve them without suffering, and second, insofar as you do achieve them, you are likely to be called on to serve in ways more painful to you, or at least demanding of you, than you can now imagine. Then why desire to evolve at all, you may ask. If you ask this question, perhaps you do not know enough of joy.” ~ Scott Peck

Loy Machedo’s Book Review - The Road Less Travelled: A New Psychology of Love, Traditional Values and Spiritual Growth by M. Scott Peck

It amazes me to know I had purchased the book when I was 19 years old without any knowledge of its contents or even an understanding of what psychology was all about. In fact even though my grasp of the English language was still in its infancy, the only driving force that compelled me to buy this book was the big bold red letters printed at the bottom of the cover ‘The Six Million Copy Bestseller’.

I picked it up assuming – if six million people had read it, maybe I should read it too. From a very young age, the thirst for knowledge and self learning were values I held very close to my heart. So this book had to be read.

The edition I had purchased was a rather old publication – printed in the typical rough wispy paper with a typical Times New Roman size 6 font - from an old Indian book shop in a village of Mangalore – South India.

It may humor you to know I even underlined words that I felt far exceeded my English vocabulary at that time. Words like ‘quirks’, ‘terrain’, ‘ludicrous’, ’slovenly’, ‘impel’ and ‘whimpered’. I would underline them and later on refer a dictionary to find out what they meant.

Such was the journey of mine many years ago as I had purchased this book. So reading this book after nearly 16 years brought back memories.

‘The Road Less Travelled’ a timeless masterpiece written by Morgan Scott Peck (23 May 1936 – 25 September 2005) is one of those rare self-help books, that debuted silently in the year 1978. It did not have the big fan fare, trumpet blaring, internet exploding and massive media campaign which we have today.

Simon & Schuster initially printed only about 5,000 copies and it was only after Dr. Peck took the initiative to send copies of his book to hundreds of newspapers and write reviews did the book finally sell a respectable 12,000 Hard Cover copies and 30,000 paperback editions.

That number doubled in each of the next two years, and in mid-1983, five years after publication, "The Road Less Traveled" reached the New York Times best-seller list for the first time. It has since spent 694 weeks on the list, the equivalent of more than 13 years.

Today his books have sold millions of copies around the world and have been translated into more than 20 languages.

This book in a nutshell is a description of the attributes that make for a fulfilled and balanced human being, based largely on his experiences as a psychiatrist and a person.

The book is divided into 3 sections.

Section 1 speaks about Discipline which he believes is necessary for spiritual, emotional, mental, psychological and physical well being. The key elements postulated here are the ability to delay gratification, accepting responsibility for oneself and one's actions, a dedication to truth and balancing

Section 2 speaks about the nature of Love, the myths and misconceptions of it being defined as a ‘feeling’ or being promulgated as ‘romantic gestures’. He brilliantly lets his wisdom and his thoughts permeate the into the readers mind by explaining his theory behind what true love is all about.

Section 3 speaks about Grace and the challenges scientific thinking, the god belief, faith systems and human consciousness operates on.

So how did I find this book?

The book lays out a blue print of balance between the human desire to seek answers while questioning the mysteries of suffering and pain. Where the book does not give easy answers, the author at the same time does not confuse the reader with grandiose terms and concepts. He masterfully simplifies the questions of the ages with answers that even a 19 year old like me with a poor grasp of the English language those days could find solace in.

The only drawback of this book is that, towards the end, in the chapters of grace, the theories and explanations appeal to the beliefs of Christians apologists and followers with well-intentioned yet futile explanations of the myth of Adam and Eve, the miracles of Christ and the biblical stories of the monolithic middle-east manufactured mythical god. However, one can presuppose that these were his beliefs and all said and done, it was communicated with the best intentions of helping people find answers in difficult times.

Overall, a well crafted, communicated and condensed book that will forever stand the test of time. I still believe this is a timeless masterpiece and I would recommend anyone with the innate desire to find the answers to difficult questions – to please read this book and feel the sense of balance and joy that I found by picking up this book many years ago.

Overall ratings - 7.5 out of 10.

This was a great teaching on values and love. A good book for us all to read in this time of warand strife in our world. Please read, enjoy and Be Blessed.

O Eterno Jogo dos Problemas


Problemas...

Problemas...

Problemas...

Quem não os tem?!
Quem não os cria?!
Quem não os adia?!...

Estão por cá desde os primórdios e não há meio de se extinguirem!
São as carraças dos nossos neuronios que nos torturam a alma e infectam a Paz!
São uma praga intemporal que tinge de negro a nossa felicidade!...

Mas quem seríamos nós sem os nossos odientos problemas?!
Não são eles os despertadores das nossas capacidades?!
As ferramentas que desenterram o nosso potencial?!
Que fazem emergir uma identidade doutra forma soterrada?!
Então porque não agradececê-los com um sorriso ao invés dum esgar de desagrado?!
Ou talvez com um risinho Gioconda, para começar?!...
Encará-los como um jogo desafiante que é mandatário ir vencendo, ao invés duma Monumental Chatice!

Abordar problemas com uma atitude positiva será, obviamente, investir na almejada felicidade

"Uma nova psicologia do amor, dos valores tradicionais e do desenvolvimento espiritual" é o que Scott
Peck nos promete neste livro, e agora que cheguei ao fim, pode-se dizer que a promessa foi cumprida.
Não é um livro fácil, pois mexe em muitos dos nossos paradigmas e preconceitos. Mas é um bom livro, que nos leva a um auto-conhecimento na nossa luta pela vida, para a qual muitos de nós não estão preparados. Fiquei a saber muito mais sobre mim e sobre o mundo que me cerca, de uma maneira não evasiva, mas muito expressiva. Gostei muito e recomendo a que se interessa sobre estes assuntos.
Se os seus interesses não vão além do que lhe é consciente, então não leia este livro.

This gives psychology a bad name.

Truly offensive.

Throughout the book, my thoughts were:
- "Why give evidence to your assumptions? Just assume things and take it from there! The conclusions will definitely be credible."
- "Whoa, is he really saying that the unconscious mind is God? Wow, no."
- "Is he really alluding to slavery as a nice way to control your emotions? Ouch."
- "OMG, was he really reporting a success case when his male homossexual patient asked a girl out? How is this guy allowed to practice?!"
- "I would be very angry if I told my therapist I was an atheist and he told me 'No, you're actually extremely religious, you just don't know it yet!'"
- "Well, I don't have to imagine in this case, as a polytheist, I'm offended. My Gods and Goddesses are no way inferior to yours. Way to insult whole cultures and religions, man."
- "Ahh stop! Why does he keep putting his Christian God in the middle of everyone's psyche all the time?!"

Kitap ruhsal açmazlarım olduğu bir dönemde bana önerildiği için tüm kitapların önüne yerleştirip okumaya başladım. Kitabın ilk bölümü bana gerçekten çok iyi geldi. Zaten şu cümleyle başlıyor:
"Yaşam zordur,
Bu yüce bir gerçektir."

Bu bölümde savunduğu ve temellendirdiği temel fikirler şunlar;
1) Kişiliğin tekamül etmesi gerektiği, bunun da disiplinle mümkün olacağı.
2) Gerçeğe sadık bir yaşamın açık ve dürüstlükle sürdürüleceği bunun da kişinin başının dik ve özgüveninin tam olmasını sağlayacağı;
3) Gerçekdışı bir yol haritasının; masalların kişiyi buhrana sürükleyeceği. Bu manada yol haritasının önemli olduğu.

Bu fikirler oldukça işe yarar. Bunların dışında pek çok fikir daha edindim. İkinci bölüm olan Sevgi de fena değildi ama diğer bölümlerin "olmasa da olur" hatta "olmasa daha iyi olur" diye düşündürdüğünü söyleyebilirim. Zira son bölümde Hristiyanlık propagandası sezdim. Eğer bu bölümler olmasaydı puanım 4 yıldız olurdu.

I read the Road Less Travelled because several Internet sites rated it the most read self-help book ever. As a therapist and fan of self-help books I felt like I needed to get right on it. I'm glad I did. Peck has wisdom and depth to spare on the topics of psychotherapy and human fulfillment. He offers a fundamental jumping-off point to anyone hoping to improve their life, whether through therapy or introspection. So you need to read it! That being said, there are some cautions. Peck can by turns be loving then judgmental toward therapy patients. His language choice and lack of sympathy at times made me cringe. He puts forth questionable opinions on boundaries as well, over-estimating (in my opinion) the degree of importance and control the therapist exercises in the patient's progress. He uses that importance to justify breaking well-established standards of professionalism and ethics in the counseling field. Finally, the last section, which addresses his spiritual beliefs, meanders. There are valuable nuggets to be mined, but they're buried within some bizarre musings. As he reflects on God and grace, Peck seems to forget he's writing to a general audience and instead expounds on his philosophies In a form more suited to autobiography than therapeutic enlightenment. At the end of the day, I'm aware I'm standing on the shoulders of a giant. Peck wrote this book in the '70s. Therapy has evolved quite a bit since then. Professionals brave enough to put forth their theories and thoughts are to be commended -- they push us forward. And Peck, whatever his imperfections, clearly comes from a place of courage and love serving not only as teacher but example for us all.

Initially, I was intrigued and really enjoyed this book. Then I got to the Grace section. It all went downhill from there, and quickly. It seems very jumbled as to the actual point of this book until the Grace section where Peck goes wacko with the God talk. Even for a Christian or person of faith, I would imagine that his ideas are far out there. As an atheist, I was dumbfounded by the abrupt bullshit and disappointed that a book with such potential came to a screeching halt. I have never not finished a book, but I couldn't force myself to read the last 30 pages. This book went from great to absolutely terrible in about 2.5 seconds. Until the utter nonsense came along, I would have given this book 4-5 stars. I would give the last section negative stars if I could. Talk about a roller coaster ending in disaster.

This is a book I have heard others talk about for more than 40 years...and finally read it for the first time. There are a number of really good thoughts/concepts here - on love, grace, spiritual growth. There are also concepts that I would thoroughly disagree with and so I would say this: read with discernment.
The concept that is worth the price of admission: the enemy of spiritual growth is . . . (you'll have to read it to find the answer, and if you don't read it, you'll find the answer).

It was a compelling and insightful read. Definitely a recommendation, even for those usually sceptical about this type of books.

The most outstanding part for me is one talking about marital relationships and what does not constitute love. In times when the idea of dependent love is heavily romanticized, this really was a breath of fresh air.

Also, as an atheist, I find the author's definition and approach to religion quite interesting. It was, if not the most respectful and open-minded, then definitely one of most respectful and open-minded ways of presenting a specific topic.