This book is a great one for understanding the systems and structures that foster both connection and isolation.

Because it’s a book “in its time,” Oldenburg’s ideas on gender often delve into archetypes/stereotypes rejected in modern social psychology and popular culture. If you keep that in mind, it’ll help you look out for the hints of sexism that peek through his writing about gendered interaction in third places.

This book is a good introduction to sociology and city development. The book focused mainly on the social settings of men, with a strong focus on the deterioration of social places caused by the integration of genders. Apart from gender binary analysis of social places, the book is great. It critiques suburbia and car dependency, which I liked. It gets difficult to read around the middle when you are swamped with excessive examples, but I'd recommend it to anyone interested in sociology/city planning.

I think Ray is badass. It’s been 30 years and we still ain’t got shit going on in the semi-public realm of informal life. People will talk about third places now in a way that makes me unsure if they know for real what it’s all about, but if y’all wanna get serious, this book is the place to be. It goes way beyond just how cute it would be to have a corner cafe. We go from the pleasures of being able to sit in a restaurant booth to play cards during off-peak hours to the literal collapse of civilization. That’s why we have to fight what we’ve built, to break the cycle, to learn to love and learn from each other, free humanity, and bring balance to the force.

This book articulates what I've always felt but been unable to express-- third places are crucial. CRUCIAL. So many places I've lived have lacked one in walking distance. There's a reason we bought our house around the corner from Farley's.

I've heard good things about this book and wanted to like it, but just couldn't. It just rubbed me the wrong way, like one of those Facebook videos that goes on about parenting in x country vs America without really advocating for a next step or looking at the broader societal reasons for the situation as it stands and just wants to condemn a problem for the sake of the attention of just shouting condemnation instead of promoting possible action steps for change. Very Europhilic - "Everything is Europe is better than in America! Europe is so cool!" Plus, I feel like it isn't taking account already existing third places or more modern third places.

To be fair, I'll probably give it another chance - maybe I just wasn't in the right mindset for it. Perhaps there are similar books that I'll like more.

I liked the idea behind this book, which is what prompted me to pick it up and read it. Here we are, a month and a half later, having finished three good books in the interim, and I've finally finished it. The fist part was interesting, albiet dry and slow going. The second part was also interesting although parts of it started to lose its appeal. The final part was filled with outrageous claims that at times made me question the author's sanity.

Anyways, the opening explains the point of the book. The author laments the loss of an informal public life, which had been maintained by third places (the first place being your home and the second place being your work).

The second part goes through a description of several different third places ranging from French Cafes to Main Street in small town America. Again, this part was interesting.

Finally, the author tried to draw conclusions and give the book an ending. This part really lost it. It dropped the review down a few stars. The author starts out sounding like an old man complaining about the way things were, but some of the author's claims are just insane. They make no sense. Which is frustrating because he still has one or two nuggets of information which get lost amid the sea of craziness. The simple fact is that not all of soceity's problems would be solved if everyeone went to a neighborhood bar for a beer or two every night. The author has serious problems with car-centered suburbia which I totally agree with but he makes no difference between car-centered suburubia and anything else. I live in the city. I don't even own a car. I can walk or take public transportation anywhere I go. Anyways, I'll give you just an idea of some of the author's outrageous claims. I apologize in advance for not offering all the context of each of these statements, but if I did that, this review would get too long and be a little too dry. And no context would fully explain these statements. 'Perceptive people often note the difference in their friends or acquaintances when the spouse is present and when he or she is not. They are stuck by the wondrous transformation when the spouse is not present. A husband may regard his wife, along with all other women, as 'dumb' or 'childlike.' He may be exceedingly 'touchy' and respond to everything she says with belligerence. He may level a steady stream of criticism at her in an attempt to bolster his self-esteem. Women often seem hyperconcerned about the impressions their husbands make in the company of others. They may correct their husbands, excuse or apologize for their shortcomings; they may critically monitor everything their husbands have to say. The male at middle age is noted for his passivity under this form of oppression. He doesn't try to be witty, interesting, or to enjoy himself when his wife is around.' 'Only in adolescence do males and females 'hang out' fairly well together.' 'A woman's mood in her home is enhanced by the presence of her spouse but depressed by the presence of her children.' 'In today's schools no less than earlier ones, the abiding concern is with accounting for the location of bodies and not the development of minds.' 'Eventually Americans will learn that the fast and hectic pace of urban life is not due to modernity but to bad urban planning.' There are more that I can't find at the moment, including the one drawing correlations between lack of a third place and domestic violence.

The author doesn't even mention the internet. I know this book was first published in 1989, but this edition was republished years later with an updated preface and the author makes no mention of the social benefits of the internet and how the younger generation uses it to socialize and keep in touch with friends across the country and around the world. This is an obvious ommission.

Just as I regretting picking Nickel and Dimed rather than the Working Poor. I really regret reading this instead of Bowling Alone.

gets bogged down a bit in the nitty gritty details of english pub life, but a solid commentary on the importance and details of third places. published in 1989 originally, i think it could do with a new edition that comments on the increasing role of technology as it relates to 3rd places

Хороший вариант - читать заголовки разделов и пару первых абзацев.

Not the most engaging of reads but an important publication.

Love the ideas in this book, but found the book itself to be a really tedious read.

I wish I read this book 10-15 years earlier. Before my travels. Everything I observed & thought about have been succintly summarized. It has to be rethought in the digital age but third spaces are still as relevant.

Bonus: pair it with Houellebecq readings and you’re gold

Ray Oldenburg really popped off with this one! I’ve been spending a lot of time thinking about neighborhoods and proximity and what it means to see the same group of people at Oddly every Friday at 7 am.

“Neighborhoods, like small towns, have never been ‘big happy families.’ Rather, the key to their amenities is that they facilitate the discovery and easy association of people destined to become special to one another.”

Here’s to 2023 and spending more time at places within walking distance, starting casual conversations in my third places, and loving my neighbors