I found this book fascinating. Neil Clark Warren, the founder of Eharmony, is arguably the world's foremost expert on marriage and what makes relationships work. Essentially, he has two points. First, to be in a good marriage you must have a healthy relationship with yourself, that is you must know yourself and be healing from any emotional trauma. Second, you need to be with someone who is compatible. No couple is perfectly compatible, but some are more compatible than others.

What makes this book important is that he not only says these things, but he actually gives healthy advice on how to achieve them. He gives you 20 questions that you need to go and answer about yourself before you seek a relationship. He gives you the categories of compatibility, that frankly are non-negotiable unless you want to be fighting continually. Finally, he tells you the characteristics that are deal breakers.

I think this book is important, especially for campus ministers and college pastors. You need a book to help you when asked: "are we a good couple?" You need a grid to answer that question with. You need a book to give dating couples before you give them the meaning of marriage. While it certainly looks and at times sounds cheesy, this book is the best I have found.

I must say this has given me a lot of insight about myself and what I'm looking for in a relationship. Hopefully it will guide me to what I've been missing out on for years now. Don't think I'll be doing the harmony thing but in for sure more well equipped to go out there and get what I want.

I do buy the author’s view that “a bad marriage is worse than no marriage at all” and thus it is crucial to know what ten qualities your future significant other should own and ten traits that are your big no-no. Just like Dr Warren says in the book, “marriage doesn’t just happen! It takes a solid set of decisions, a huge amount of skills and enormous willpower.” This book does help readers how to list that 10-qualities-list to aid you to determine if the guy you are seeing is worth more than two dates.

The way I see it is that the earlier you read this book, the lesser the chance you kiss the wrong frog. If I were lucky enough to have kids in life, I would get them to read this book after high school graduation.

I would recommend this book to anyone, of any age or generation, who is considering dating or marriage. It may sound cheesy, but I think the strategies outlined here of knowing yourself well, knowing what you want in a partner, and how to discover whether someone is a potential fit or not are timeless and beneficial to anyone seeking a life partner.

Had some very thought-provoking questions and some qualities/characteristics to consider about yourself and the opposite sex
Recommended by Janice Pittard

I read Warren's book "Finding the Love of Your Life" a while back & this felt like reading the same book. I always enjoy honing my dating "skills" but I almost feel like this is also why I'm still single: there are simply too many things that need to match up between me & a woman that I will never find anyone :(

Bought this book for me and a friend when I found 2 copies at a thrift store. NOT bc we are looking for marriage.. Been there done that and have the t-shirt thanks! But bc it was 50 cents. So WTH, and bc a way of weeding out the ones who turn into asses would be helpful.
Skimmed thru it.. Seems interesting so far.. And the "self-questions" and stuff looks interesting, and applicable to more than just dating.. But to life in general.. And to those of us looking to find ourselves.

More important things to worry about than dating at this point... More important than even finding myself at this point. Don't need anything deep to think about.. But will def come back to this after I complete a current project.

This was an easy read and gave you a lot of food for thought. Had I read this book 20 years ago, it might have saved me a whole lot of wasted time dating the wrong men. This book challenges you to take a hard look at yourself and what you truly want in a permanent partner. He even has a chapter on how to tell the other person gently that you do not want to pursue the relationship any further. When my daughter gets old enough, I will pass this book onto to her and encourage her to use it to date effectively. The only thing I did not like about this book was the push to join Eharmony. It wasn't a gross push but I would have preferred that left out.

So smart, so practical. I will most definitely be applying Warren's principles for wise dating! Highly recommend to anyone looking for marriage and not wanting to waste time with someone who isn't suitably matched to them.

exactly the same questions that eharmony uses

The most practical dating book I have ever read by far.

So... this book was more targeted for adults, but I like to read books before people consider me "in age" for it. And I have to say, this book didn't really start interesting me until halfway through, but I enjoyed it so much more than the other relationship books in a lot of regards. Unlike books where religion is the only focus (like, don't be interested in a guy or girl who is not a Christian like you or something like that), this book focuses on the more practical everyday things like "does this person make eye contact with me when I'm speaking" or "does this person share my love for shopping." No other book has really taken a deep approach with that! So, not the BEST relationship book out there, but definitely one of the better ones :D!