Member of the Club: Reflections on Life in a Racially Polarized World by lawrence otis graham

★ ★ ★ ★ ★

April 17,2025

One of the best analysis' of Racism that I have ever read. Graham uses his personal experiences to underscore the Racism's connection to institution. Not only did this book validate my own personal experiences, it is also made me laugh and cry simultaneously.

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toshiro

★ ★ ★ ★ ★

April 17,2025

12/15/2007: Just finished the first chapter - really great and pretty shocking. I had heard about this book from This American Life.

12/27/2007: A great read. I liked most of the book, with the exception of the interracial dating chapter and the chapter on the NAACP. The former was out of touch and the latter was just boring. But the rest of the book was so interesting, especially his writings on his time at Princeton, the undercover stint at the country club, and the Black professional chapter.

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Rammelbips

★ ★ ★ ★ ★

April 17,2025

This is a great, though dated (early 90s), book that offers needed perspective on this issue of race. Graham tackles AffirmativeAction, mixed race relationships, upper middle class life, and other issues, mixing the black and white experience. The only quibble I have, other than the age of the book (I think there needs to be a 2nd Edition post-Obama), is that the author describes himself as middle class when he is obviously rich/very upper middle class. But I wish a lot of people would read this so we could have a REAL discussion on race.

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pipiyopi

★ ★ ★ ★ ★

April 17,2025

I was required to read this book as an undergrad. As it turned out, I was the only person in my class to actually read it. My classmates really missed out!

This book sparked my interest in sociology so greatly that I went on to study the subject for years...and still am. It challenged me to see the world around me differently and to consider WHY I might be treated the way that I am and why OTHERS might be treated the way they are treated. It challenged me to pay attention to my surroundings and my own reactions to specific situations. I cannot tell you how many times I have looked around a restaurant to see who is seated where. (read book to understand this)

I really appreciate any book that can impact my life and stay with me for years to come and "Member of the Club" has done a fine job impacting me.

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Vene

★ ★ ★ ★ ★

April 17,2025

heard him on npr--powerful piece on unseen racism of the upper classes. Hard hitting, but hard to take his privilege at times.

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_lapeace

★ ★ ★ ★ ★

April 17,2025

While this is an older book now, it still seemed insightful on the dilemmas faced by some Black Americans. It is also eye-opening to learn about some of the overt racism the author encountered in the 80s and 90s. I appreciated the transparency and the reflectiveness of many of the essays.

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DefinitelyAWeeb

★ ★ ★ ★ ★

April 17,2025

I picked up this book after hearing a story about the author on This American Life. Graham, a black East Coast lawyer, found that he could not gain membership in any of the country clubs where his white colleagues made contacts and closed deals. He decided to get an inside look the only way he could -- by getting hired as a busboy. Between his interactions with the other staff members and the conversations he overhears between the club's patrons, it's clear that racism is alive and well in an almost astonishingly overt way.

As a reader, I found the rest of the essays hit or miss. Part of this was due to the fact that Graham's audience shifts starkly from piece to piece, addressing white people sometimes (to explain something about black people) and other black people at other times (to criticize some trend he sees within the black community). There was also the fact that this book was published almost twenty years ago, so the constant slew of current events references was difficult to follow for someone who was barely in middle school at the time. Much of Graham's remarks were about "the current state of things" in one area or another, and it was hard to know which problems have persisted and which have changed in the past two decades -- in particular, Graham's comments on black leadership left me with the impression that he never considered we might have a black president within 15 years.

That said, there were a few different essays that particularly struck me as providing a new and valuable perspective I had not considered enough, that of the well-to-do black professional who moves in primarily white circles. Most memorable were a series of restaurant reviews that Graham provided of some of the top restaurants in New York City -- restaurants which his white colleagues and friends had recommended but which, by and large, proved to provide an uncomfortable experience for a black man, including being stared at, regularly mistaken for a staff member, blatantly lied to, and ignored by employees.

Having recently read "Why Are All The Black Kids Sitting Together in the Cafeteria?" and My Beloved World, I thought that Graham's apparent disdain for any kind of self-selected racial segregation, and desire for an aggressive push for integration from on high in all settings, illustrated the extent to which his perspective was colored by his own particular upbringing in predominantly white settings. Nonetheless, in the areas where he was sharing his own unique experiences and not attempting to speak on behalf of all black people (something he criticized and yet did frequently himself), I found this book valuable and insightful.

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Peanutonaboat

★ ★ ★ ★ ★

April 17,2025

I originally began reading this book because one of the essays was discussed on This American Life. While the first essay- the same one read on the radio- was really good and thought-provoking, I began to feel as if the book was no longer necessarily reflective of our society. At least, I really hope it isn't. And when he began discussing the pros and cons of interracial marriage, and coming down kind of hard on interracial marriage, I began to seriously disagree with what he was saying. I don't know. It's hard because I am not black and haven't had to deal with all of that. But I'd like to think the world is a better place than he makes it out to be. Particularly because the book was published over ten years ago. Call me naive.

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Member of the Club: Reflections on Life in a Racially Polarized World

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