I picked up this audio book for just $1 on clearance. Since I've never been a big fan of James Patterson, I thought I'd give this one a try. Moreover, it's narrated by Lou Diamond Phillips! I entered this experience completely blind, not bothering to read the back cover or do any research before popping in the first disc.

Incredible. Absolutely INCREDIBLE. This was hands down the worst writing I've ever had the misfortune to encounter. I've described it to my friends as an 8th grader's creative writing homework assignment, but in all honesty, I believe an 8th grader could have done a better job. It was as if someone said to James, "Hey, uh, James... this is really boring. You really need to jazz it up with some adjectives or something." So, James reached for a thesaurus and went wild. I only wish I had a paper copy so that I could provide you with an example word for word. This paraphrased sentence will have to do: The tall, young, blonde guy got out of bed, took a quick shower, then dressed in a maroon Razorbacks sweatshirt, bell-bottom jeans, and blue and white sneakers. At other times, the overdone adjectives rambled on about something completely irrelevant to the story, like this one: The hotel maid dropped off his room service dinner while wearing a crisply ironed uniform and a shiny bracelet given to her by her dead grandmother's first husband. Or what about the line describing the people in town with faces the color of pretzel sticks. What the heck.

After just 10 minutes of listening, I seriously considered ejecting the disc not only from my CD player but also out of my car window. And then LDP started adding sound effects. He actually ca-cawed like a seagull, sliced like a machete, and pew-pew-pewed like a BB gun. I give him major props for going all out, and I decided to continue listening, just to see how bad this whole thing could get.

I once saw a movie about a murderous tire. That little gem at least had a plot that made sense. One solo star for Lou Diamond Phillips.

Ridiculous vacation book #3

First James Patterson.

He is a renowned author who has made a significant impact in the world of literature. Patterson's works are known for their engaging plots, vivid characters, and fast-paced storytelling.

His books have sold millions of copies worldwide and have been translated into numerous languages. Patterson has written in various genres, including mystery, thriller, and romance, appealing to a wide range of readers.

Last James Patterson.

Despite his long and successful career, Patterson shows no signs of slowing down. He continues to produce new and exciting books that keep his fans eagerly waiting for more.

His ability to consistently deliver high-quality literature has earned him a loyal following and numerous accolades. Patterson's influence on the literary world is undeniable, and his works will continue to be enjoyed by readers for years to come.

Whether you're a die-hard fan or new to his writing, there's no doubt that James Patterson is a force to be reckoned with in the world of books.

Starting to read Patterson from the very beginning. It's an exciting journey that lies ahead. I'm looking forward to delving into his works and uncovering the mysteries and thrills within.
Wish me luck as I embark on this literary adventure. I hope to be fully immersed in the stories, experiencing every emotion along the way. Patterson's writing is known for its gripping plots and engaging characters, and I can't wait to see what he has in store for me.
As I turn the first page, I feel a sense of anticipation building up. Will this be a page-turner that keeps me up all night? Only time will tell. But for now, I'm ready to lose myself in the world of Patterson and enjoy every moment of it.

I always make it a point to force myself to finish every book that I start reading. However, man, this particular one was an absolute struggle to get through. From the very beginning until the end, I literally had no clue as to what was actually going on. There was a complete lack of any character development. I found myself in a state of confusion throughout the entire reading process. In fact, I didn't even have an inkling about some of the parts of the book until after I had finished it and went on to read other reviews. The main character couple had no backstory whatsoever, which made it extremely difficult to connect with them on any level. Additionally, there were these odd and random scenes involving nudity and sex that seemed to serve no purpose at all. I'm quite certain that not all of James Patterson's books are this bad, but unfortunately, this one was really not good at all.

I literally got up and threw this book in the trash when I was done with it. It was that bad.

From the very beginning, the story failed to engage me. The characters were flat and uninteresting, lacking any depth or personality. The plot was predictable and full of holes, making it impossible for me to suspend my disbelief.

The writing style was also a major turn-off. It was dull and lacking in creativity, with no real flair or imagination. Sentences were short and choppy, and the dialogue felt forced and unnatural.

I struggled to get through each page, constantly hoping that something would improve. But alas, it only got worse. By the time I reached the end, I was so relieved to be done with it that I didn't even hesitate to toss it in the trash. This is definitely a book that I would not recommend to anyone.

This is James Patterson's second book in his writing history. Just like his first book, it's clear that he ventured into publishing books before he was truly prepared.

Although this book was marginally better than his first one (The Thomas Berryman Number), it still remains at the same level of perplexing writing, with ample room for improvement. Once again, there were an abundance of characters and story arcs to keep track of. I was constantly bewildered as to where we were in the story, which characters were interconnected, who the bad or good guys were, and what emotions I should be experiencing towards any of them. It seemed as if he aimed to pen a book filled with plot twists and surprises, but he overdid it. In the end, the "twists" were merely confounding revelations that added nothing to the storyline whatsoever.

I'm determined to carry on with my mission of reading all of his books in sequence. I'm presuming that the upcoming titles can only get better from here.

The Worst Book Ever!

I just finished reading a book that I can only describe as the worst book ever.

From the very beginning, I was unimpressed. The writing was dull and lacked any sort of creativity or excitement.

The characters were one-dimensional and uninteresting, and I found it impossible to connect with them on any level.

The plot was predictable and full of holes, and I could see every twist and turn coming from a mile away.

To make matters worse, the book was poorly edited, with numerous spelling and grammar mistakes throughout.

I had to constantly stop and reread sentences just to make sense of what the author was trying to say.

In conclusion, I would not recommend this book to anyone. It was a waste of my time and money, and I will definitely think twice before picking up another book by this author.

I hope that other readers will be spared the same disappointment that I experienced.

As with all Patterson stories, this audiobook was tightly written and well plotted.

It masterfully wove a tale of the CIA's intricate involvement in the tumultuous and highly volatile tiny Caribbean/Latin American island country of San Dominico.

The writer skillfully painted a vivid picture of the clash between greedy Capitalists and the native socialist fervor that was spawned by a local warlord. But was it really that simple?

The CIA had enlisted a rogue assassin husband and wife team, known as The Roses, to incite a revolution. Our hero then attempts to put an end to both the killing and the killers.

I won't go any further, as I don't want to spoil it for you. However, there are numerous twists, turns, and "oh my goodness" moments that lead up to the conclusion.

Just like in nearly every Patterson novel, the ending seemingly rewards the villain and leaves a rather foggy and nebulous feeling at the finish. I guess he figures that you can simply think whatever you will as the curtain closes.

As always, the vivid descriptions and tight writing are as expected. However, the rather shallow character development of nearly every character, even the protagonist, is also a common trait. His novels seem to be increasingly following a formula and becoming more predictable.

Confusing book!

The mafia had the intention of opening casinos on a Caribbean island but were refused.

Subsequently, they met and hired two killers, Damian and Carrie Rose, for a sum of $1.2 million to unleash terror on the island.

The plan was that there should be no witnesses to their brutal murders. However, Damian had been seen.

Surprisingly, instead of going after Peter MacDonald, the witness, he killed his girlfriend.

In response, Peter swore to take revenge and kill Damian.

This complex and thrilling story unfolds with a web of motives, actions, and consequences.

The reader is left on the edge of their seat, wondering what will happen next and how the characters will navigate this dangerous situation.

Will Peter succeed in his quest for vengeance? Or will Damian manage to evade him and continue his reign of terror?

Only by reading further can one discover the answers and fully understand the intricacies of this captivating tale.

The story presented is rather confusing, making it difficult for the readers to follow the narrative clearly.

The characters lack depth and seem a little weak and two-dimensional. They don't have the complexity and development that would make them truly engaging and relatable.

Moreover, the plotting is extremely jumpy. It skips from one event to another without a smooth transition, leaving the audience feeling disoriented.

It's important to note that not every bag of popcorn is great either. Just like the story and the characters, some things may seem appealing at first glance but upon closer inspection, they fall short of expectations. In this case, the overall package fails to deliver a satisfying experience.

Perhaps with some revisions and improvements in the story, character development, and plotting, this could have been a much better work. But as it stands now, it leaves a lot to be desired.

An excellent book awaits you, narrated by the talented Lou Diamond Phillips. His engaging voice brings the story to life, captivating your attention from start to finish. What makes this audio experience even more thrilling is the addition of theatrical music. The music enhances the atmosphere, adding an extra layer of excitement to the narrative. Whether you're a book lover or someone who enjoys a good audio adventure, this combination of a great story, a skilled narrator, and captivating music is a must-have. I highly recommend it to anyone looking for an immersive and enjoyable listening experience. It's sure to transport you to another world and leave you wanting more.