He rose from the street and crossed the area of the rooms and all the corridors of the courthouse, all of them filled with the smell of disinfectant. While the lawyer continued his speech. Fragile memories of a past life that had once again become mine were fluttering around me. But it was the life in which I had known moments of joy and then forgotten them. The smells of summer. The neighborhood that I loved. The evening sky. The laughter of Marie and her dresses. The boredom with all the insincere things that I used to do there. And all that came back to me was a longing until I finished all this and returned to my chair and slept. It should be noted that the camera's image of this strange man in Algeria, as it imprisoned him, was indicating a greater strangeness, which is the strangeness of this man inside his body and imprisoned in this world as a whole, as if he was waiting to return to another place. A place that has no connection to this world. A place that we do not know and cannot imagine.
Well, the best description that can be given of him is that he has no soul or has an empty soul. He doesn't believe in anything. He is emotionless and without feelings. Even pleasure has no value for him except in terms of being an animal behavior to pass the time only. So it's no wonder that he commits this random crime without awareness and if he were aware, he would be even more evil and corrupt on earth with that attached personality.
And I spent a foggy day occupied with the subject of appeal. And I think I got the most out of this idea. Because I was calculating my probabilities and extracting from my thoughts the best that could be extracted. I always took into account the worst probabilities in my calculations: that the appeal request would be rejected. In that case, I would die if I was younger than others. This is self-evident. But everyone knows that life is not worth living. And in my decision, I was not unaware that there is no difference between dying at thirty or sixty. As long as in both cases other men and women will continue to live. And this will last for thousands of years. And in the end, it did not happen that there was anything more obvious than this. I will always be the one who dies. Whether I die now or in twenty years.