Heeft nog lang geduurd voor ik dit uit had...
:-)
Maar serieuzer: dit vond ik een nuttig boek. Als aartsuitsteller snap ik iets meer van mezelf en de procrastinators om me heen. Ik las een ebook-versie maar ga een papieren versie kopen om nog vaak in terug te bladeren.

Perhaps this one is too embarrassing to list here:-)

I got it via inter-library loan, and have procrastinated finishing it, but so far it does have some unique solutions.

ETA: I read it in a rush, which perhaps helped because I just skipped any annoying examples or verbose parts. I thought several of his ideas were original and fit me well. So often, because I haven't done what I "Should" do, I don't let myself do what I want to do either. So I end up doing unproductive things, etc. Anyone faced with that "inner rebel" that rebukes your best plans, will find helpful concrete ideas here. He also illuminated how we take things we want to do and turn them into chores via our self-talk. I love the idea of committing to "play" and then setting 30 mintues prior to it for the work you're avoiding. Also the focus on starting instead of finishing. I'm always telling myself, I have to finish *it* by Friday, by tomorrow, instead of just focusing on when will I start again...

Obviously not for everyone but I think I'll want to reread it again.

Trì hoãn một công việc là dấu hiệu của việc trốn tránh sự sợ hãi nếu thất bại khi thực hiện công việc đó
Sự trì hoãn là vấn đề mà tất cả chúng ta thường hay gặp phải. Cho dù nó rất phổ biến nhưng sự trì hoãn lại thường gắn với những trường hợp rất là đặc biệt
Thông thường chúng ta hay trì hoãn công việc, khi có những nhiệm vụ như viết báo cáo, tổ chức một cuộc seminar, hoặc chuẩn bị bài thuyết trình trước đồng nghiệp
Đây là những nhiệm vụ khá là đặc biệt và hoàn toàn không nằm trong danh sách công việc hằng ngày đúng không? Giống như chúng ta thường hiếm khi trì hoãn trả lời tin nhắn của đồng nghiệp hoặc tham gia vào một hội bà tám nào đó, nhưng chúng ta thường cố tình trì hoãn bắt đầu chuẩn bị nội dung cho việc thuyết trình
Và những tác vụ mà chúng ta thường xuyên trì hoãn có 3 đặc điểm như bên dưới
* Chúng ta muốn thực hiện một công việc mà chúng ta hay làm thay vì làm công việc mà lần đầu tiên/hạn hữu lắm mình mới phải làm. (tất nhiên vì hay làm nên ta làm tốt, và vì thế ta nghĩ rằng “Ôi mình giỏi vãi”)
* Thứ hai, chúng ta tưởng tượng khi làm tác vụ đó, mình cảm thấy: “Ơ đệt mình đang làm cái quái gì thế !?!!”." Chả vui vẻ khi phải làm công việc tay chân đó cả"
* Cuối cùng, vì là công việc hạn hữu hoặc lần đầu phải làm, nên chúng ta không hề có một tiêu chuẩn nào để đánh giá sản phẩm sau khi chúng ta làm ra cả. “Mình làm xong rồi, giờ mình sẽ review lại nó, Ơ ơ , reivew như thế nào nhỉ? Số lượng slide như thế này là đủ chưa nhở :-?, Hay là thêm vài file nhỉ … Và sẽ ra sao nếu như bài thuyết trình mà chúng ta vô cùng tâm huyết không được mọi người đón nhận?
Khi đối diện với những tác vụ như trên, hệ quả đầu tiên luôn là chúng ta phải lựa chọn giữa
* Nếu bắt đầu thực hiện thì chúng ta sẽ dành thời gian đối với một thứ (có vẻ) là nhàm chán, cộng với việc chúng ta sẽ có thể đẩy cả bản thân / người khác vào sự thất vọng
* Nếu chúng ta không bắt đầu nhiệm vụ này, chúng ta sẽ tránh được một việc (có vẻ) nhàm chán, tránh được cả nguy cơ có thể kéo người khác lẫn bản thân thất vọng
Tất nhiên nghĩ một cách thực dụng thì chúng ta đều chọn trì hoãn. Và theo một cách nghĩ nào đó, thì trì hoãn trong tạm thời cũng là một cách tốt.

Chúng ta được dạy là công việc là đáng ghét và thất bại thì đáng xấu hổ và đáng sợ
Tất cả giáo viên và những bậc phụ huynh khả kính đều tin rằng, họ hiểu tại sao những đứa trẻ thích trì hoãn: Rõ ràng là, chúng ta đều có sự lười nhác thuộc về bản năng bên trong.
Và một đứa trẻ cần kỷ luật, khen thưởng và xử phạt để chiến thắng được sự trì hoãn. Và nếu những đứa trẻ nào không đủ chăm chỉ, thì chúng ta cần thúc giục chúng, la mắng chúng để chúng chăm chỉ hơn phải không
Không, nhận định này sai một cách cơ bản, giống như niềm tin sai lầm của các đấng sinh thành rằng con mình luôn thích trì hoãn, có hàng tỉ ví dụ chứng minh lười nhác không phải bản năng của con người, và chúng ta khi mới sinh ra cũng không phải là kẻ thích sự trì hoãn (cố hữu)
Thử nghĩ, chúng ta có trì hoãn không nếu được bạn rủ đi nhậu, hoặc được ai đó mời làm điều mình thích (ví dụ bạn thích bida, nếu có ai đó rủ bạn chơi bida thì bạn có trì hoãn việc đó không? )
Chúng ta đều có những thứ muốn làm mà không cần phải có sự hối thúc hoặc hình thức xử lý từ người khác .
Chúng ta luôn trước khi đi học đều rất tự do, nhưng người ta đã dạy “học” là ngược với “chơi” hoặc “làm” là ngược với “giải trí”. Giống như khi bạn đang ngồi nhâm nhi tách trà (một hành động yêu thích) thì sếp bước vào và bạn lật đật phải dẹp tách trà và chúi đầu vào màn hình vi tính.
Tất cả chúng ta dần dà bị tiêm nhiễm trong người rằng chúng ta cần phải cố gắng hơn nữa, vì mọi cố gắng đều chưa đủ, và để chạy theo chủ nghĩa hoàn hảo đó (trong công việc cũng như h���c tập) thì chúng ta phải đánh đổi một số sở thích, hay thời gian dành cho chúng. Và một khi biết rằng chúng ta không bao giờ đạt sự hoàn hảo, chúng ta cảm thấy công việc đang làm thật vô nghĩa và chúng ta cảm thấy sợ và ghét bỏ chúng

Lòng tự trọng của chúng ta được kết nối với công việc và sự trì hoãn sẽ góp phần bảo vệ nó
Mỗi người trong chúng ta đều có một nhu cầu được người khác nhìn nhận và đánh giá cao. Chúng ta luôn muốn cố gắng tập trung những người tung hô, đón nhận chúng ta ở quanh mình và vì thế chúng ta sẽ cố gắng tránh mặt những người hay bỡn cợt và lấy chúng ta làm trò đùa.
Trong thế giới phương tây, điều này càng rõ ràng hơn khi một người sẽ được đánh giá thông qua công việc họ làm, và vị trí nghề nghiệp của họ
Và chúng ta đã học được rằng, chúng ta chỉ đáng giá khi mà chúng ta chúng ta làm việc chăm chỉ và đạt được một vị trí nổi bật nào đó
Vì vậy chúng ta thường tôn trọng những bác sĩ, giáo sư mà lại đánh giá thấp những người nghèo khổ, hoặc vô gia cư, chúng ta cho rằng họ chưa cố gắng đủ và vì thế chúng ta đánh giá thấp họ
Và bởi vì, công việc chúng ta đang làm (bao gồm cả công ty, chức vụ …) có mối liên hệ mật thiết với lòng tự trọng, nên nó sẽ rất tự nhiên khi hầu hết mọi người sẽ đánh giá người khác thông qua công việc người đó đảm trách.
Và vì chúng ta sẽ bị đánh giá bởi công việc chúng ta đảm trách, chúng ta cảm thấy có một nỗi lo sợ vô hình khi phải đảm nhận một công việc mà chúng ta hoàn toàn có khả năng thất bại
Hệ quả là tự nhiên chúng ta sẽ trì hoãn công việc đó.
Chúng ta sẽ bảo rằng : “Chúng ta thất bại không phải vì chưa cố gắng đủ, mà là chúng ta chưa cố gắng” , nếu thất bại.
Bằng cách này chúng ta có thể bảo vệ được lòng tự trọng của chúng ta trước những mối hiểm hoạ do sự thất bại gây ra.


Học lấy câu thần chú để chống lại sự trì hoãn: “Chúng ta chỉ có thể học khi mà chúng ta thất bại”
Một trong những thành phần chính cấu thành sự trì hoãn là :chủ nghĩa hoàn hảo. Không cần biết chúng ta làm gì, chúng ta luôn tự nhủ rằng, kết quả phải thật hoàn hảo, là thứ tốt nhất có thể
Sai lầm phải được phòng tránh bằng mọi giá và sự thất bại là không thể chấp nhận được hay chính nó sẽ ảnh hưởng đến “hình ảnh đẹp đẽ của ta trong mắt mọi người”
Chính vì áp lực quá lớn phải thể hiện bản thân một cách hoàn hảo cho người khác xem, chúng ta tự khoá mình lại bằng cách trì hoãn, chúng ta không làm gì để băt đầu nhiệm vụ đó ngoài, lướt facebook, sắp xếp lại màn hình desktop, tự tưởng tượng ra vài công việc “khẩn cấp” để vùi đầu vào trong cát. (ắt hẳn chúng ta đều biết đến con hình ảnh con đà điểu vùi đầu vào trong cát
Tuy nhiên, những người thành công họ lại không làm thế, thay vào đó họ nhảy bổ vào công việc. Họ không sợ sai lầm, vì chỉ bằng sai lầm, họ mới có thể cải tiến được. Nếu có bất cứ sự thất bại nào họ lập tức lùi lại một bước trước đó và thử tìm một hướng đi khác.
Sự thật là nếu chúng ta không thử, chúng ta sẽ không bao giờ trở nên tốt hơn. Nếu chúng ta cứ làm đi làm lại một công việc mà không có sáng tạo cho nó thì cũng không bao giờ chúng ta trờr nên tốt hơn.
Vậy thì trong lúc đó những người trì hoãn, rề rà họ làm gì? Họ sợ, và tránh làm việc, họ cho rằng con đường hoàn hảo nhất là 1 đường thẳng, (vâng 1 đường thẳng từ chỗ họ đang ngồi cho đến điểm đích) và bất cứ những thứ gì họ làm đều phải hoàn hảo ngay từ đầu, nếu không đúng như thế thì đó hoàn toàn là sự thất bại không thể chấp nhận được và sẽ làm đổ sụp tượng đài bản thân mà bấy lâu nay họ đã tự gầy dựng cho mình.
Những gì họ không biết là: ngay cả những tuyệt phẩm của Picasso cũng bắt đầu bằng những bức tranh tệ hại.
Đơn giản : Sai lầm thất bại là không thể tránh khỏi, và quan trọng là chúng ta học được gì từ sai lầm đấy

Thay đổi cách chúng ta tự nhủ từ “Tôi phải”, “Tôi nên” thành “Tôi sẽ bắt đầu khi… để nó có thể hoàn thành lúc ...”
Một người hay trì hoãn thường phải đối diện với xung đột bên trong họ. Sẽ có 2 giọng nói: một là giọng nói tỉnh thức, “tôi cần phải”, “tôi nên làm” … và một giọng nói của tiềm thức, của nỗi sợ hãi “Tôi không muốn”, hoặc chúng ta có thể hiểu, giọng nói của tỉnh thức chính là một phần phản ánh giọng nói của tiềm thức, do “tôi cần phải…” nên điều này có thực sự là do tôi muốn làm không? Hay là một cách nói khác của từ “Tôi không muốn”
Sự xung đột liên tục này sẽ làm tiêu hao nhiệt huyết của bạn, nó sẽ không định hướng được cho chúng ta và có khi làm chúng ta bị stress và suy nghĩ tiêu cực về nó.
Thay vì vậy nếu chuyển hướng nhìn cuả chúng ta từ nạn nhân (người phải thực hiện một công việc), sang một hướng chủ động hoàn thành công việc.
Chúng ta từ một người nhận việc thành một người giống như sếp chúng ta, chúng ta có mục tiêu rõ ràng, deadline cụ thể.
Và chỉ cần rõ ràng như thế, tự chúng ta sẽ bắt đầu công việc, và một khi bắt đầu công việc rồi thì cũng đâu có quá khó phải không nào

How a person’s self worth is not defined by the work per se was an eye opening concept for me. I am going to first attempt to apply the concepts so shared by the author and then maybe I will be in a position to write a proper review. Let’s hope I don’t procrastinate.

Overall it’s an easy read and keeps you gripped if you have also encountered the good old habits of procrastination.

I don't think of myself as a huge procrastinator, but I think all of us are in some form or fashion. I'm messy. I'd rather read than do dishes right after I make dinner. I leave my shoes everywhere. I'm on Facebook too much. And I'm trying to streamline things that I do, make my life a little easier by getting on the ball. I think had interesting things to say as to why we procrastinate, and how to get around it. The most intriguing one is the Unschedule--you only get to "treat" yourself after you've done 30 minutes of uninterrupted work, and once you've done that work, put it on your calendar. So your calendar doesn't fill up with tasks you dread (11am--work on Jones report), but AFTER you've worked on the Jones report, you put it on your calendar, thereby a) giving yourself a tiny gold star, and b) being able to track how long it REALLY took to finish the Jones report. I think often I'm not honest about what I'm actually doing or how long that thing actually takes, and then the day just fritters away. I'd probably be amazed at how much or little time I spend on certain activities that could best be spent some other way. Seriously, if you could figure out how much actual, concentrated work you do a day (and shut up, it's not 8 straight hours daily) I think we'd be much more productive. I'm going to try out a few of these habits and see how they do for me.

However, I did try a simple habit last week of immediately doing something (dishes, putting away the shoes) as soon as I saw/thought about it, and it made me feel so much better! I didn't feel guilty about relaxing. Fiore is big on "guilt-free play", so schedule your time to get the annoying stuff out of the way first!

Get this book...like NOW!
You've got to be willing to put in the work to reshape the habits and this book provides practical tips for facing your procrastination. I would suggest putting this in your brain after Organize Your Mind, Organize Your Life AND The Willpower Instinct. The former will provide you a great deconstruction of the phases of the attention process. The latter will reveal some stuff you're doing to get in your own way.

Either way, don't expect overnight changes. If you're thinking about the steps and techniques and then not doing them be encouraged. That's your brain dipping a toe into the change process.

Although my procrastination patterns have been entrenched so deeply that I even procrastinated reading this book (!), I had never had much insight into their underlying causes and mechanisms. The Now Habit has given me a valuable understanding of where they stem from, along with several simple, yet effective strategies to tackle them. If your modus operandi is "I'll do that later" and your to-do list is so full that just looking at it makes you cringe with horror, I strongly recommend reading this book - now!

3.5 stars

As with all self-help books, I took what was best for me and ignored the rest.

I am definitely not as bad a procrastinator as many of the people he describes. When it comes to being able to move my life forward, I've always been able to get things done (to finish a degree, for example). I do procrastinate, but not to the point I'm self sabotaging. I seem to know the threshold to which I can procrastinate. But, I also think that procrastinating makes me feel more stressed and less content because it's associated with guilt as Fiore discusses. So I'd like to do it less. I found his discussion of why people procrastinate interesting (e.g. perfectionism, fear of failure, as a form of resistance).

One of his central pieces of advice is a cognitive behavioural re-framing of your activities in terms of choice. I choose to do this task. Of course we want to do something more when we choose to do it, and of course you are choosing to go to work, and therefore are choosing to do the task at work you don't want to do, but also, you aren't really choosing it. It's choice in the absence of any other real option (yeah, you could get another job, but you don't really have a choice about exchanging your labour for capital in one form or another). So I had a hard time buying this. I can argue myself out of things like this that don't really resonate for me, and that's where mindfulness based practices have helped me where CBT has failed.

There was also a mindfulness piece to this book. I felt like he could have explained the flow state better, or more in depth. I tried the meditation to enter a flow state and didn't notice anything markedly different than I would from practicing any other meditation or relaxation practice. So is there something really unique about the practices he offers? I'm not so sure.

One of the most valuable things I took away was the part near the end where he talks about your time being finite. That you simply don't have time to pursue every interest or passion you might want to and maybe some have to be put aside for retirement, or another time where you want to switch up your focus. He questions whether you are really procrastinating (as you move forward with your journey and have broken this habit) or whether you really are short on time. This was a good one for me because I think I often feel guilty about not doing things, but I'm constantly doing productive things, I just don't have a realistic idea about how many things can fit in a day, and I have too many hobbies/passions/commitments. But I always feel guilty about whatever one I didn't get to today. So reassessing where you want to put your energy is important, and realizing your own limits and the limits of time.

The other main thing the book gave me was better awareness, as I tracked it, of when I procrastinate and what the thought process is. Just being more mindful of it helped me to recognize it and do it less. But I didn't use a lot of the more formally structured parts of this book such as the unschedule.

I really enjoyed the book because it gave me insights on why sometimes I do procrastinate (of course also an idea why generally someone is procrastinating). The book was also packed with interesting tips and steps to overcome procrastination. Sometimes though it felt a bit boring or had common sense advice. But in general I found it pretty helpful and insightful. Some of my detailed notes from the book:

5 statements that distinguish procrastinators from producers:
1. Negative thinking of “I have to” but I don’t want to gives you a sense of ambivalence and victimhood and this is used to justify procrastinating. Replace “I have to” thoughts and statements with “I choose to”.
2. The negative thinking of “I must finish” keeps you focused on a completed project somewhere in the future without ever telling you where to start. Replace “I must finish” with “When/ where can I start” or “When is the next time I start”.
3. Negative thinking of “This project is so big and important”. The bigger and more overwhelming a project seems to you, the greater the tendency to procrastinate. Replace “This project is so big and important” with “I can take one small step, I can start for 15m-30m” just start with anything small and do one small step at a time.
4. The negative thinking of “I must be perfect” will greatly increase the chances to procrastinate in order to buffer yourself against the pain of failure and criticism. It also means you’re condemning any small steps, not appreciating the progress but rather comparing it to what you think it should be. Replace “I must be perfect” with “I can be perfectly human”. Replace demands for perfect work with acceptance not resignation to but acceptance of your human limits, accept your “mistakes”, which are really just a feedback as part of a natural learning process. You need self-compassion rather than self-criticism to support your efforts at facing the unavoidable risks of doing real imperfect work rather than dreaming of the perfect completed project. Separate the stages of 1) starting (intuition and creativity), and 2) of polishing and editing. Don’t try to do both at the same time.
5. Negative thinking of “I don’t have time to play, I must suffer” will make you feel resentment towards your work, that comes from long periods of isolation and deprivation. Repeating these statements creates the feeling of having a life of obligation and demands, that causes you to miss out on the times of fun and play. Replace “I don’t have time to play” with “I must have time to play, I must have guilt-free play in my schedule”.

The now habit program provides you with 10 tools to overcome procrastination:
1. Create safety so you can lessen the fear of failure and learn how to bounce back from mistakes.
2. Reprogramming negative attitudes to yourself through positive self-talk, develop positive phrasing that directs your energy toward task oriented thoughts and rapid solutions. Your worth doesn’t equal your work and performance.
3. Using the symptom to trigger the cure - how to use old habits to evoke and strengthen positive new habits.
4. Guilt-free play - how to strategically schedule your leisure time in order to shift your focus from work to play.
5. 3 dimensional thinking and reverse calendar - how to control the fear of feeling overwhelmed by important tasks by creating step by step calendar of your path to achievement with adequate time to rest and fully appreciate your achievements.
6. Making weary work for you - how to develop plans, achieving your goals, coping with distractions and facing the worst that could happen.
7. The unschedule - let you see the freedom of prescheduled, guilt-free play.
8. Setting realistic goals.
9. Working in the flow state - work in state of focused energy.
10. Controlled setbacks - help you turn setbacks into opportunities.

Procrastination and performance anxiety work in 5 major stages:
1. You give a task or a goal the power to determine your worth and happiness - you think to yourself getting this job, passing this test, dating that person will change your life and make you happy. When a perfect performance or the achievement of a specific goal becomes the sole measure of your worth and happiness, too much is at stake to just start working. Without some leverage like procrastination to help you break the equation that says that this performance determines your worth as a person. Fear of failure stems from assuming that what you produce reflects your ability and your ability in turn determines your worth as a person. Procrastination allows you to break this equation and to resist being judged by your products and production.
2. Perfectionism raises the task so that any mistake would be same as death, any rejection or failure is intolerable. Therefore you demand to do it perfectly. Many of us feel that our performance measures not only our ability but also our value as humans. We procrastinate as a way to not give our best work and therefore attempt to protect our sense of worth.
3. The more issues you pile upon a task, the more serious the threat for an error to occur. So in a series of what-ifs you create a catastrophic image of a row of falling dominos, where one mistake leads to the loss of a client, which leads to the loss of a job, leading to a failure to find another, etc. So you seek temporary relief trough procrastination.
4. You use procrastination to temporarily escape your dilemma, which brings the deadline closer, creating time pressure and higher level of anxiety and the more immediate threat of failure and self-criticism. By delaying enough so you can’t be tested on your real ability and worth that is what you could do if you really had enough time.
5. You use a real threat (like a fire or deadline) to relief you of perfectionism and to help act as motivator. It overrides the paralysis of your perfectionism and fear of failure.

You should create safety nets in your life so that falling isn’t so awful. You can do that by saying to yourself as if talking to a frightened child: “Whatever happens I will survive, I will find a way to carry on. I won’t let this be a judgement of your worth as a person. I won’t let this to be the end of the world for us. I will find a way to lessen the pain in my life and maximize the joy.” You must create a protected and unjudgable sense of worth for yourself. Say to yourself even just as words initially- whatever happens - you will make yourself safe.
The self-talk of “should” has the negative effect of setting up counterproductive goals, envying others, and longing for the future. Each “should” creates the following negative self-critical comparison: it compares an ideal state with a reality that is negative, it compares the finished point with an uncomfortable or bad starting point, it compares someone you admire with a lower or bad sense of self, it compares a future state of bliss with a current state that is negative and bad. “Should’s” communicate that where I am and who I am now is bad. Change “I have to” to “I choose”. Exercising your power of choice will give you the opportunity to redirect toward constructive effort the energy that was formally blocked by feelings of resistance and victimhood. You do have a choice - you don’t have to want to do the task or love it. But if you prefer to do it to the consequences of not doing it, you can decide to fully commit to it, wholeheartedly. Since you have made a mature commitment to the task rather than arguing against it, you might as well do it as pleasant as possible. You can exercise your power of choice and learn to embrace the path that makes the most sense to you. And precisely because you have chosen to do it, it becomes less difficult, painful and more quickly accomplished. If you can’t embrace it - let go of it, choose the consequences.

There are 3 major fear blocks (terror of being overwhelmed, fear of failure, and fear of not finishing) that block action and create procrastination. As little as 30sec of staying with a feared situation (eg a dog, crowded party, giving a speech), while using a positive self-talk, is enough to start the process of replacing a phobic response with positive alternatives. Unlearn the phobic response of procrastination and learn alternative ways of coping with your fears with 3 tools:
1. 3-dimensional thinking - to combat the terror of being overwhelmed and the fear of starting. Divide the work into its various parts and tackle them piecemeal, so you can start the first section already today. The reverse calendar starts with the ultimate deadline for your project and then moves back step by step into the present, where you can focus your energy in starting. Creating a reverse calendar for the project will give you a timeline for each step, letting you know how much time you must allocate in each week.
2. Work of worrying - to tackle the fear of failure. 6 steps for facing fear and creating safety: 1) What is the worst that can happen? Also consider how probable it is. 2) What would I do IF the worst thing happened? Consider where you would get help, how would you cope with getting upset and losing control, what would you do after that until you know that you will keep doing your best to carry on. That there is no event so terrible that can stop you from carrying on. 3) How would you lessen the pain and get on with as much happiness as possible even if the worst did occur? 4) What alternatives would I give myself? Have I limited my options by insisting on only one perfect job, on being dictatorial of how my life should be, what should I do to increase my opportunities that are acceptable to me? 5) What can I do now to lessen the probability of this dreaded event occurring? Is there anything I have been procrastinating on (a call, email, meeting) that I need to face so I can lessen worry, create safety and get you start working on the task. 6) Is there anything I can do now to increase my chances of achieving my goal?
3. Persistent starting - to tackle the fear of not finishing, fear of success. Identify the counterproductive statements and attitudes that tend to creep into your mind once you have started your work. Then use your anticipation of these negative statements to prepare challenges, take the fear out of finishing and free up your creative energy for the good stuff. Keep on starting. The task of finishing has its own qualities of tying things up and polishing. But essentially all large tasks are completed in a series of starts. Keep on starting and finishing will take care of itself. When you are afraid of finishing - ask yourself when you can start. The 6 most common negative statements and attitudes: 1) I need to do more preparation before I can start - be alert when preparation becomes procrastination. There is no escape from work - there is work involved in more preparation, completing the project, trying to escape through procrastination. So why not chose the work to take one step forward in doing work to completion. 2) At this rate I will never finish. The rate of learning and accomplishment in the beginning of a project is often slower than you are accustomed to. Later it will go faster. You can’t judge the rate of progress by your current ability or knowledge. 3) I should have started earlier. You got started and you should appreciate that. Do the 3-dimensional thinking and break your project into sections with breaks and guilt-free play. Make sure you reward every step of the progress even small ones. 4) There is even more work after this. Avoid feelings of “have to” and victimhood about work that isn’t even here yet. You can make that decision later when you see how you feel about mastering this step. You are in control of when you will face the next piece of work and that you will be stronger and wiser after completing your current step. 5) I’m trying but it’s not working - can indicate perfectionism and failure to do the work of worrying to develop alternative plans to make this project succeed in spite of difficulties. Rather than hoping for a perfect path with no problems, you can maintain a resolute commitment to make things on this path work for you. 6) I only need a little bit more time. You must learn to tolerate the anxiety and risks of finishing even though if you know your work isn’t perfect. Acknowledge that valuable time is wasted on polishing in an attempt to ensure perfection. Learn to cope with criticism by taking your ego off the line that is by creating safety and separating your worth from your work.

The unscheduled is a weekly calendar of committed recreational activities that divides the week into manageable pieces with breaks, meals, scheduled socializing and play, plus it’s a record of your productive work time. List beforehand rewards, that you can look forward to in your breaks. Begin with the image and scheduling of play and guarantee of leisure time rather than work so that you know you won’t be procrastinating on living.
Fill in your unscheduled with work on projects only after you have completed at least 30m of work. Think of the unscheduled as a time clock - you punch in when you start work and punch out when you take credit for your progress. You want to maintain an excitement of what you have accomplished rather than anxiety of how much more there is to do. Take credit only for periods of work that represent at least 30m of uninterrupted work. Before deciding to go to a recreational activity or social commitment, take time out to work just 30m on your project so you can create motivation for the activity that follows (uses your attraction to the pleasurable activity to get you started more often, allows you to enjoy the leisure activity without guilt).

Certain types of distractions like strong emotions need to be dealt with immediately but the large majority of distractions can be dealt with after you have completed some quality work. If you have extreme difficulty to concentrate, write down some distractions and review them after you have done some work. There are at least 5 types of distractions:
1. Strong emotions - type of distractions that deserve your immediate attention. Allow yourself some time (can be brief even as 15m) to think through and write down what you can do to cope with the situation or change it, where you can get support and when you can contact friends.
2. Warnings of danger - events that stimulate adrenaline fight or flight reaction. Eg pressure messages like I have to do this by x date. Challenge those messages and remember you have alternative ways of surviving even the worst that can happen. Remove threats and do the work of worrying without any imagine catastrophes by creating a coping plan and a safety net.
3. To do list reminders - write down those distractions to do them later instead of remembering them.
4. Escape phantasies - record those phantasies (eg food, trips, sex, vacations) to plan your future guilt-free play.
5. UFO (unidentified flights of originality) - creative and often seductive thoughts that might not be understood at the moment might pass through your mind while you are working on a project. Let them fly by or record them.

3 steps to help you set goals effectively:
1. Recognize the work involved in procrastinating - let go of the fantasy that you can escape work by procrastinating. There is no path in life that requires no effort. Prepare yourself for making a commitment to your goal by recognizing that there are costs involved in both working and trying to avoid work. The choice is not working or not but rather which type of work. Even feeling guilty because of procrastinating takes effort. When you commit to a goal you commit to a form of work that will bring you longterm rewards. When you procrastinate you are choosing a self-punishing form of work that will bring you temporary relief.
2. Freely choose the entire goal and all the work involved (the tedious and fun parts) in achieving that goal. Delaying gratification is a process of scheduling the pain and pleasure of life in such a way as to enhance the pleasure by meeting and experiencing the pain first and getting it over with. Choosing to face the pain because getting it out of the way allows you to start on the more pleasurable parts, makes all the difference in how you experience the task and how much you control any tendency to procrastinate.
3. Create functional, observable goals. Vague goals must be translated into something tangible that you can do. A realistic goal includes an action verb, a deadline, and a cost component (usually time or money). Eg I will complete painting the house by 1st June by investing at least 15h a week. Divide your goals into action oriented, clearly observable subgoals. These subgoals will tell you what you need to do today in order to get closer to that ultimate goal. They will help you visualize when, where and on what you need to start each day to achieve your goal by a certain deadline.

Managers must keep in mind the 3 main issues that are at the bottom of most procrastination problems:
1. Feeling like a victim
2. Being overwhelmed (breakdown tasks and focus on starting)
3. Fear of failure
You should address those areas by communicating in terms that eliciting commitment rather than compliance, by focusing on manageable objectives rather than overwhelming expectation, and by providing praise for steps taken in the right direction rather than just criticizing mistakes. You must communicate to your workers that they are entrusted with the responsibility and the authority to participate with full commitment to the task. Statements that invite commitment take this form: what can you get to me in rough form by noon; I placed you on a responsible position and I depend on you to be here at 9 o’clock; we need to be able to trust each other’s work so I need you to follow the guidelines precisely, let me know if you have any problem with them; I have responsibility for this unit but there are some things that I don’t see, blindspots in my way of working so I need your help in keeping me informed if I miss some things.
You must focus on starting immediately vs finishing, break down tasks that can be started right away and avoid statements that place emphasis on finishing (eg when will you finish this project, you have to complete this by Friday, there is a lot to get done - remember the deadline is only 2 months away). Examples on being clear about where to start: when can you start on a very rough draft, I need this by next Friday - plan to have a rough sketch before our meeting on Tuesday at 10 o’clock so we can go over it together, would you draw a rough agenda on the necessary steps for closing the John’s account and have it to me by 3 o’clock then we can set a realistic timeframe for its completion, if we are going to meet that deadline of 2 months on the Smith case I would need to see at least an outline by Friday, do you need someone to take over your other responsibilities while you can get started.
The point of combining constructive recommendations for improvement with praise is that it tells workers more clearly which actions are correct and which ones need further effort without causing undue stress that disrupts their ability to learn. When recognition for a job well done precedes any criticism, it lessens fear of failure about mistakes, recognizes that they are doing something right and their efforts are appreciated, and gives direction that is less likely to offend and more likely to be heard as a useful instruction on how to accomplish organizational objectives.
In relationships instead of nagging and telling somebody what they “should do” but rather express what you “want, choose, decided” or “would like” and use non-blaming requests, assert your individual needs while respecting each other’s values, become more interest in results rather than blame or control.

This book has great suggestions to get a project finished. They include to do a little bit, as little as 15-30 minutes at a time. Another suggestion was to just start anywhere. And, they suggested a jabberwocky start. That is my word application for a time when you just shoot from the hip and do not aim for accuracy.
This last idea makes sense to me since I try to write to the end of a project without editing. Otherwise, if you edit as you go along, you will be older than dirt before it is done.
My two criticisms were that too much time was spent telling us what they would be telling us and a worksheet that was talked about but not accessible for the audio book.

very useful and eye opening. However, ideas are not as well organized as I expected. I struggled to catch the flow between really useful tips, idea and resources. Definitely going to read again!

This book spoke to me!! Great way to end the year and kick off the new year with the “why” we procrastinate and some tips on overcoming it!