I’m trying to think of any other book that had me sobbing as hard as this one… my heart is heavy but i loved it so much

I read this book a while ago, but remember the story relating to everyone. I would recommend.

Alright. I re-read one of my favorite books of all time. Mind you, the first and only time I read this was when I was 16/17, upon recommendation of my high school English teacher to use in an essay about mental health in literature. I wish I could re-do whatever I wrote in that essay because I promise that I missed the point the first time.

Re-reading this as a young woman - oof. Dolores is a toughie. I don't know how or why, but her character is so intertwined with me and when I pick this book up it feels like I'm right alongside her. Worried to death about her.

You see the red flags with Dad and Mom's relationship, but what can you do? That's love, you're told - until it isn't. Jack Speight - what can you do as just a girl? A man who woos everyone around him and seems so generous, so he must be safe. Dante - the man who so piously offers himself as just a selfless man... or is he just full of s***? It feels so heartbreaking to be alongside Dolores and know that she is a victim of so many different people and circumstances.

The whale thing also went so over my head the first time I read it. I thought it was so dumb, but I understand it's literary merit and appreciate it for what it is.

Reading this book was bizarre and surreal. An anonymous person in a Facebook writers’ group suggested it when I asked for recommendations of books that might attract readers similar to the ones who like my own work.

In the beginning, She’s Come Undone undid me. Although it is a different style and has a whole different flavor than my work, it has so many similar ingredients to n  Plan Z by Leslie Koven (written ca. 1986, published in 2001) and newly published n  The Last Will & Testament of Zelda McFiggn, as well as an unpublished book, that I feel a bit gobsmacked! Since I wrote my books long before I'd even heard of She's Come Undone, I can only conclude that my muse is two-timing me. Thwack-thwack, you slutty sprite!

Okay, that's out of my system.

Now on to She's Come Undone. I enjoyed protagonist Delores Price, but at first her voice struck me as too literary. Was this Wally Lamb unable to surrender to a character who might write less well than he does? But I was wrong. The pacing of the revelation of this literally enormous character is wonderful. She beaches slowly, like the whale who occupies the middle section of the book. The grownup literary voice at the beginning of the book deteriorates into the angry child and the crazy obese teenager of her life story, only to return once she recovers—a skillful permutation of first-person voice.

The novel is divided into three parts: Our Lady of Sorrow, Whales, and The Flying Leg. I especially enjoyed Dolores's younger periods (the first two parts). For my taste, the book got too talky in part three—the kind of blow-by-blow description of thoughts and feelings that often characterizes "women's fiction." But I loved the ending.

There is a lot of talk in the Introduction (which really should be an Afterword, since it's full of spoilers) about how miraculous it is for a male writer to so convincingly write from inside the head of a female protagonist. I disagree. Wally Lamb did what good writers do: he surrendered to his muse. And now that she's done with him, I hope she will get back to the pressing business with moi!

This is the story of protagonist Dolores Price from age four to forty (from approximately 1952 to 1992). Dolores experiences one setback after another in her life – parental divorce, multiple deaths in the family, rape, an eating disorder, attempted suicide, mental health issues to the point of hospitalization, abortion, marital infidelity, infertility issues, friends dying of AIDS, etc. She enrolls in college to please her mother, but only finds more abuse and bullying. Afterward, she sets out to find her ex-roommate’s boyfriend, and initially succeeds, only to be met with more disillusionment. Her grandmother becomes her only touchpoint, but there is a distance between them that cannot be bridged.

I think the author does a good job of establishing Dolores as a sympathetic character; however, this is another “misery book” where so many bad things happen that I found it difficult to wade through it all. I kept hoping for some mitigation of the misery, but just when I thought something positive would happen, Dolores must go through more suffering. It is a character-driven story of survival despite trauma and tragedy. I am not a big fan of books that emphasize sorrow and suffering with very little hope or optimism. I wish I could get better at spotting these types of books so I could avoid them.

Although well-written, this is one of those books that I finished in a few short days because I refused to put the book down until something good happened to the main character...

Yeah. Good luck with that one.

This was an extremely depressing story, and kind of killed my New Year holiday vibes. I thought it was a bit of an overkill with all of the terrible things that happened to one person. It was literally one thing after another, to the point where I was kind of rolling my eyes.

My three year old nephew was taught "good choices" and "bad choices" in school, and whenever his older brother does something naughty he goes "Bad choices, brother!", which is adorable. In this book some bad things happen to the main character, but for the most part I couldn't help but want to shout "Bad choices, chick! Because really.

Recommended for masochists.

my therapist recommended this book i love her

Note to self: When you're about to take your kid to swimming lessons and you think "Hmm, that book's getting a little intense, it might not be a good idea to take it" and you start looking for a pool-suitable book but then you think "Meh, it'll be fine" and just take the damn book - when that happens, don't come complaining to me when you end up having to surreptitiously wipe and blink away tears because yes, the book got very intense and emotional. And then you have to stay up half the night finishing it because you just can't leave Dolores hanging.
Learn from my mistakes, people.

Dear Bob, please deliver me from anymore sanctimonious books about the struggles of forging an independent identity and moving on from traumatic events. They were really good and really touching the first, ummmm, 20-30 times I read them, but at this point it just feels like I'm reading retreads of the same old tired story. I've seen this movie. They gave Angelina the Oscar for it even though Winona deserved it more. But that is neither here nor there. Is the book well-written? Yes, it most definitely is. Every review of it seems as if it's required to gush over the fact that Wally Lamb is a man and yet somehow manages to capture the view from a woman's perspective so accurately. Due to the exigencies of anatomy, I don't feel qualified to comment on that but I can say that the story is at least mildly interesting and definitely well-written.

I'm forced to wonder though, would I have liked this book more had the front jacket not featured Oprah's ever-present Seal of Approval? Did my disdain for her empire of influence color my opinion before I even read the first sentence? Would I have been more open-minded if the book hadn't constantly been preached to me as an "incredible piece of writing" that hit many of my friends "at a very deep and personal level"? Maybe, but I guess we'll never know. My reading of the book was tainted by pre-formed opinions based on the manner in which the book came into my awareness. I'd say that maybe I would put this back on the shelf and read it again 5 years from now when I have forgotten all of the hype, but life is short and my reading list is long and I don't feel the need to reread merely average books.

She’s Come Undone (Wally Lamb)

A week after finishing this book, I still have conflicting opinions. It’s hard to synthesize them into a coherent review, so I’m just going to summarize what I liked and disliked.

On the plus side:

Easy to read: The story is told as a first-person narrative by the main protagonist, Dolores. Though her actions can be exasperating to the point where you want to shake some sense into her, she is always engaging, keeping a sense of (sometimes gallows) humor as she recreates her story. And it’s impossible not to admire Lamb’s skill in writing from the perspective of an overweight, overwhelmed woman as he tracks her history over the 25-year span of the book.

Growth and development: It’s incremental, it’s painful, there is backsliding – but there is growth. The ending offers a measure of comfort, but to a degree that seems deliberately subdued – there is no fairy-tale ending here. Lamb is showing us that adversity can be overcome, but doing so is hard work. And don’t get too comfortable – any ground that you gain in life could be lost overnight. There is something completely admirable in the way that Dolores doesn’t simply buckle, but – against considerable odds – manages to reach a level of self-awareness that affords her a measure of contentment in her own skin

As against that:

Hard to read: For the same reasons that the book of Job is not your favorite book of the bible (If the book of Job is your favorite, either you need psychological counseling, or have evolved to a remarkably advanced spiritual state. Either way, you probably won’t get much from this review). The tribulations just keep coming. Guilt about parents divorcing? Daddy abandonment issues? That’s just the baseline. Let’s pile on a little molestation, rape, 150 or so excess pounds, several years in a psychiatric facility, peer rejection and gratuitous cruelty, marriage to a philandering narcissist, abortion, and the death of almost everyone dear to you. You can almost hear Satan betting with that dear old-Testament God. Dolores’s failure to conceive is almost a relief – at least we’re spared the prospect of a child-immolation scene.

Growth and development: Wait now. Didn’t I list this under the ‘things to like’? Well, yes I did. So sue me for also disliking it. Because there is that unavoidable Oprah sticker right on the cover of this book. And it’s completely obvious why – the kind of uplift that is doled out makes this book a shoo-in for Oprah-approval. But it’s hard not to feel that one is being emotionally manipulated throughout, on a grand scale. To which my – possibly irrational – response is “Dude, if you’re going to play the reader like a cheap violin, then at least have the decency to provide more of a feel-good ending than you do”.

Dead whale metaphors: Give me a break, Wally! Was this really necessary? Best you could come up with? Why not just club me over the head and have done with it?

And, if I were a lesbian, I think I’d be within my rights to be offended by this book.

You can tell, I’m all over the map where this book is concerned. Which means it got under my skin more than I might like to admit. Which is what allows it to keep its third star.

I read this book ages ago. While I can't comment on specifics anymore, I will say that this book was one I couldn't or wouldn't put down. Wally Lamb is a masterful writer who creates real and very believable characters. He is able to express in words the intricate details of our everyday lives. What an amazing storyteller! Writers like him don't come around very often. Once I read this book, I vowed to read anything else he ever writes! He certainly knows what he's doing! If you haven't already read this book, you certainly should. Lamb is a writer NOT TO BE MISSED!