This book reveals the importance of community as individuals climb the economic ladder. Despite wealth and elite education, these families still faced racism and found solace in their community. Some moments were cringeworthy, but Graham's work is a stark reminder that beyond wealth, race remains a barrier, and community is essential.

“While some members of the black elite have occasionally engaged in such divisive behavior as placing too much emphasis on family lineage, membership in certain clubs, and complexion—even to the extent of passing for white—the group has, since its beginnings in the 1870s, celebrated one important thing: contributing to American culture. It is a group that values intellect, success, and tradition. And while they may have arrived in this country as slaves or free men and women from Africa, the West Indies, or Europe, their accomplishments and contributions were achieved on American soil.”(p. 396).

This one came off hold from the D.C. Library and while I don’t usually do nonfiction I was intrigued by this one from the TV show to the subject matter and the acceptance of an elite group of Blacks that live well despite all the stereotypes and secrecy surrounding their prestigious societies–
“Folks don’t want to hear about rich blacks unless we’re playing basketball, singing rap music, or doing comedy on TV.” (Prologue)

With the great storytelling of a narrative with pieces of well researched history throughout.. this one starts out interesting with him telling the story of his upbringing and the hypocrisy of wealthy Blacks to those who live better than others….

“Even though it was 1968, a period of unrest for many blacks throughout the country, Great-grandmother—like the blue-veined crowd that she was proud to belong to—seemed, at times, to be totally divorced from the black anxiety and misery that we saw on the TV news and in the papers. (p. 2).

The level of separation is fascinating between his grandmother and elite Blacks seem to judge others but still support them–

“The fact was that she was completely dedicated to the members of her race, but she had a greater understanding of and appreciation for those blacks who shared her appearance and socioeconomic background.”(p. 3).

With all the background from slavery as to why there is a distinction the division is still there as even from youth kids know the difference between them and every other Black person not on their level…
“ I already knew that there was us and there was them. There were those children who belonged to Jack and Jill and summered in Sag Harbor; Highland Beach; or Oak Bluffs, Martha’s Vineyard; and there were those who didn’t. There were those mothers who graduated from Spelman or Fisk and joined AKA, the Deltas, the Links, and the Girl Friends, and there were those who didn’t. There were those fathers who were dentists, lawyers, and physicians from Howard or Meharry and who were Alphas, Kappas, or Omegas and members of the Comus, the Boulé, or the Guardsmen, and there were those who weren’t.(p. 4).

t
The breakdown of how the color “lightskin” “darkskin” rivalry started with slavemasters abusing their slaves and the practice of freeing slaves in the South allowed Blacks to turn against themselves for another reason–class and money.

“Free blacks in the South were generally required to carry papers proving that they were not slaves and were required to register annually in their counties, listing their white guardians. However, they were permitted to work for money and to own property, thus creating the first opportunity for blacks to establish their families with soWe’ve got some of the best-educated, most accomplished, and most talented people in the black community—but at the same time, we have some of the most hidebound and smug. And adding even further to the mix are those of us who feel we need to apologize to the rest of the black world for our success and for being who we are. For me, the black upper class has always been a study of contrasts……….The nucleus of the black elite was formed around these families.”(p. 18).


The book’s chapters focus on how and where the black elite live, educate and socialize—
There is focus on the children’s groups and social organizations with alot of emphasis on the Jack and Jill organization to allow Black children the room to meet other Black potential playmates and significant others…

“Black suburbanites have leaned on Jack and Jill for generations because the bucolic streets outside their home failed to reflect the racial diversity of the cities.(p. 25).

After graduating from Jack and Jill and entering the world college and university is expected with few schools being the goal for their children but school definitely being the best way to find a suitable mate..

t“Whether they began as free people of color or as enslaved house servants, those
blacks who came to make up the black aristocracy were typically those who were able to gain an education and various professional skills.”(p. 9).
The HBCUs of Morehouse, Spelman and Howard are the goals and you learn so much about all these schools in this book full of research and direct quotes and names of the most powerful..

“When I encounter Spelman women of my own generation or of my mother’s generation, I recognize a sisterhood and a camaraderie that I have never seen among black women who attended predominately white women’s colleges or who have joined sororities at other historically black schools.” (p. 75).

While all schools should do only those were definite entryways into black high life–

“Because of their roots as industrial—rather than liberal arts—institutions, both Hampton and its successor, Tuskegee, are sometimes looked at as second-tier when compared with their Atlanta and Washington counterparts.(p. 79)

While in college to keep up the heavy social standings and prestige there are also the fraternities and sororities as well as countless other organizations to be social and know the best and the brightest in the community—

“To understand this mentality is to understand the difference between white fraternity life and black fraternity life. While the former is mostly limited to a three- or four-year college experience, the black fraternity experience begins in college but is an activity that has even greater importance after graduation.” (pp. 84-85).

The influential groups of the Black Elite includes: the Girl Friends, The Links, The Smart Set, The Boule, the sororities and fraternities of Alpha Kappa Alpha, Delta Sigma Theta, Alpha Psi Alpha, Omega Psi Phi, Kappa Alpha Psi, the Drifters, The Northeasterners…
Of course having the right groups is nothing if you also don’t live in the right places and the book breaks down major metropolitan areas and why the black elite choose them with Atlanta being the creme de la creme for successful Blacks wanting to get to know other successful Blacks..

“Exerting its power in the worlds of politics, business and academia, Atlanta’s black elite sets the gold standard for its counterparts in other cities. “We’ve had three black mayors with national reputations,” says my friend Janice White Sikes of the city’s Auburn Avenue Research Library on African American Culture and History, the nation’s best collection of black Atlanta history documents. “We are home to the best-known historically black colleges. And in addition to hosting the Olympics we have some black-owned companies that are the oldest of their kind in the country.” (p. 321).

Finding their own vacation spots, own cities, organizations and worlds built on wealth and privilege the Black elite also had to deal with teaching their children where they came from and why they should be grateful and understanding of those less fortunate..
t“ In Chicago there is no major metropolitan area that has a better-organized black upper
class than I was hearing great stories about important entrepreneurs, socialites, and political figures who came out of the South Side, but all I was seeing were working-class and out-of-work black people standing along Wabash, South Michigan, and Indiana Avenues. A crumbling, all-black neighborhood to someone with my very “white” and very elitist perspective undermined any chance for me to believe that there were once people like me living here. And therein lies the difficulty in teaching middle-class, integrated black children about their people’s past.” (pp. 183-184).

The dissociation of them from every other Black person working and not making enough can even jade them to obvious instances of injustice–

“In retrospect, I understood all that the minister and others in the service had been implying. Because of our own class-based narrow-mindedness, segments of the black population often didn’t react to or care about racially biased abuses until one of our own—a black member of our socioeconomic class—had been victimized. Every city’s black elite had one of these pivotal moments when an abuse reached into its own group and shook up an otherwise complacent community of professionals.”(pp. 184-185).

You can only empathize and relate to those you understand and living apart and sheltered from other Blacks there does create a division until it hits closer to home…it is both the reason why Black people formed their own world and have such hard time accepting others–

“When you grow up in a place surrounded by people who feel like an extended family—people who are well-educated and accomplished, people who care about your history and your future—you feel inspired. When a black child spends summer after summer in an environment like this, she grows up feeling as though she can accomplish anything.” (p. 181).

I learned so much about why there are so many secretive Black organizations and why the sense of tradition and history is so powerful they are reluctant to share it with just anyone –you must be the right kind of people which is why everything they are about seems so exclusive..I just learned of this amazing place I live kinda close to and have never heard of–

“While not the most prominent of the black elite vacation spots, Highland Beach is the community that enjoys the most interesting place in black history. It was the first Maryland town to be established and incorporated by blacks and was home to famous black political leaders, intellectuals, and businesspeople who built cottages in the community. Interestingly, it has its own mayor and a board of commissioners to handle common municipal matters and local ordinances.”(p. 179).
I also loved the sense of reflection and realness I got from the descriptions of Oak Bluffs in the infamous Martha’s Vineyard and how it is a mecca for the rich Black to get away–though surprisingly with all the wealth there and Black millionaires there are not many Black businesses…

“We lived a wonderful life in New York, but it was one where race always seemed to be a factor in the things we saw and heard. In Oak Bluffs, we felt in control of our environment and protected against the offenses that were often witnessed by black children and black people living in a predominately white society.(p. 168).

“We are the richest blacks in the country and we have virtually no businesses here,”
says an embarrassed Oak Bluffs resident whose family has summered there for three generations. “It’s a disgrace. Part of it is our fault because we get up here and just do a lot of profiling and social climbing. But white people are also at fault because they are not eager to support black businesses.”(p. 166).

The awesome life of money, luxury, social gatherings and fun is intoxicating and intriguing–I loved the personal anecdotes of his childhood though I envied all the culture and activity he and his friends are constantly exposed to—

“I was a summer kid who defined the resort by the boundaries of the black neighborhoods and by whole days and evenings spent with our extended black family in our all-black tennis tournaments, all-black yachting trips, all-black art shows, and all-black cookouts, and the white vacationers had no relevance for me.” (p. 152).

“one unalterable impression that remains today is that when vacationing among our own kind, in places that have been embraced by us for so long, there is a comfort—and sanctity—that makes it almost possible to forget that there is a white power structureadtouching our lives at all.”(pp. 152-153).

The book ends with the most damaging of isms in the Black community as they heavily address classism and some racism but then there is the colorism and the preference for light skin in the Black community—
“Skin color has always played an important role in determining one’s popularity, prestige, and mobility within the black elite.”(p. 377).

They go into the reasons—-

“This is not to say that affluent blacks want to be white, but it certainly suggests that they have seen the benefits accorded to lighter-skinned blacks with “whiter features”—who are hired more often, given better jobs, and perceived as less threatening.”(pp. 377-378).

And then the book discusses stories of passing from Black family members throughout history—

“Some people don’t understand why a black person who was born with a good background of educated and well-to-do parents would want to pass, but I think it’s more likely that we would try to pass rather than a poor black person because we actually get to see what the most privileged white person has in life.”(p. 383).

This was eyeopening..well researched and even well written with its glimpses of narrative writing, lots of quotes, dozens and dozens of names and history ..makes you wish you were born into this world for a chance at debutante balls, tennis games and more but a glimpse was enough and this was good..I don’t really do nonfiction but it was surprising..glad I got to it..

This book attempted to take on a wide-array of subjects concerning an under-researched grouping of AAs who also had done a good bit of record-keeping themselves. And he succeeded, the book's take on everything from the chosen "elite" secondary schools and colleges, to the prevailing attitudes toward conduct and colourism, to the tight-bonds formed by social organizations, fraternities/sororities, and specific activist groups, was all well-researched and written plainly.

My only two issues are: of the book's age (an updated version is an absolute must, as a few things have changed in the last 20+ years since this was written), and occasionally of the repetition, particularly in the descriptions of the "Black Elite" in various cities, perhaps "chunking" of groups member would alleviate a bit of that. Overall an absolute must-read, both for those who are unaware of the existence of a historical Black Elite, as well as those who haven't quite thought of themselves as being a member of said group.

Interesting look at the upper class of black society that largely goes unnoticed in modern society.

Wow, I can definitely see why members of the “black elite” were upset when this book came out. He gave a first hand account of the life. The author is a member of the black elite who barely passes the brown paper bag test, who grew up in Jack and Jill, attended Harvard, joined the Bolay, went to all the right parties, donated to the right charities... He was very much a part of the know and he named names and shared the discrimination that although common place among the black community it is something that’s not discussed in polite society. For example how often black people discriminate against each other using the brown paper bag test, or good hair measure, where your parents went to school, how it’s desireable in certain socities to be fair skin but not ok to marry white. How often people “passed” and what the rules to passing successfully are. What sororities and faternities are good to join what shows that you are low class, same goes for the church you belong to - and what it says about you if you did not belong to any. This book is filled with tons of interviews from the Old Guards and the new elite sharing their experiences. Finally, this book also showcases a lot of the accomplishments of black people during a time when most blacks in this country were still enslaved. Very well written thorough account - even sharing personal maybe even embarrassing memories that does not paint the author in the best light but shows his sincerity. If sociology even remotely interest you this book is a must read.

Lawrence Otis Graham crafts, a book... Not a particularly bad book per say but... His narration comes off as arrogant or narcissistic, and in general a bit dickish. He has this habit of mentioning that he's attracted to most if not all of the young women he interviews. Another bad habit is his repetition, he hits the same beats and perspectives at least twice per chapter, every chapter, which might've been fine if the perspective wasn't so muddled and personally offensive at times. Every once in awhile he'll bring up some bigoted section of the upper crusts views that in some ways are hard to decipher if he is the one that believes that or the faction of whatever group he's talking about at the time. The book is also incredibly dated, it misses the new generation of black celebrities, tokenism, the black middle class, and new civil rights movements like black lives matters and how the upper crust would react to that. In addition other little details don't line up with the image presented, parts of his childhood recollections and his later in life conversations feel less humanlike and more like a protagonist of a fiction work going about his heroic crusade to... Stay rich? But it isn't just the main character that doesn't quite fit, the offhand remarks about Charity donations feels like last minute additions to no come off as complete assess, but instead they're kind of plot holes in that if significant donations from wealthy black people were being made to the poorer communities the poorer communities really should be improving instead of declining rapidly like they are now, similar stories should be popping up around civil rights movements where black political leaders point to wealthy blacks as role models and targets to aim for, a representation of what is possible, but instead the black elite's names are left off of history, unmentioned. This problem especially becomes apparent when the author talks about Malcolm Ex's widow and daughter or how he's really good at getting along with black and white people. This in particular gets my goat because I don't really think he's black. Technically he's definitely black, his genetic lineage proves it, but he really doesn't deserve to call himself black. He grew up completely surrounded with middle class white kids, the only black kids he really associated with were black kids from his exact same situation, he was then funneled through a system designed to make him as white as possible through incentives, stigma, and enforcement by emulation instead of actual intermingling. At no point did he really reconnect with the majority of his race or the traditions our modern traditions were born from. Instead he's divided from the world, in almost every way he's rich and white, he only doesn't see himself that way because the other rich white people can only see him as black. I went through almost the same thing growing up in the upper middle class being mixed black and white, I came from the same neighborhoods, had almost identical living situations was barely more than a shade or two darker than them in the winter and had no interest in sports or rap, but every time I meet someone who is for all intents or purposes like me in upbringing and personality the first question I'll be asked with depressing certainty is "what's your favorite sport/team". Then when I say I have no interest in sport they'll give up, they'l just shut down any attempt to get to know me from there. But those aren't the worst parts, the really annoying people keep telling everyone around them I'm their friend, at almost any point someone new shows up the first or second thing they'll bring up is how I'm their friend, which I'll deny, then they'll both laugh like it's a great joke, I'll insist and they'll laugh until I give up, because to them it's a bit part from a thing that pretends to be human. Sometimes these people can't actually emphatically connect to me, I could tell them the most tragic sob story of my life and all I get is one long blank. But that still doesn't suck like the way the people that know me handle this, the whit kids who know me say I'm white or will act like they didn't hear me because they're scared to say I'm black, the other black and mixed kids who grew up in the same situation and environment's as me make a show of being black to me, we perform being black because people don't want to talk to us unless were stereotypes, and neither of us can be honest that it's just a show, then my poorer black relatives just assume I'm black but light skinned, the whole being part white thing doesn't even occur to them, or my black aunt, uncle, grandparents, and mother who have lived so much of their lives in suburban white neighborhoods we've found it routine to explain we're of the black race but not the black culture, that we're more or less black soles in white bodies, and all of that just to get called a N@#$%r in the boy's locker room. Then Lawrence Otis Graham comes along whose even less black then you and claims he's full black. Not just full black, but a part of a "superior" black upper class exclusive to a kind of people that's so far removed from the rest of what is black it might as well be a minstrel show in full black face for being completely cartoonish. So in a lot of ways this book was completely insufferable for how up his own ass he is with how much detail and importance he fills out the groups and sub-groups within groups split by age and color and family history and college and sex and geography, it feels a little like a joke. But at least he got history, In school black people were exactly three things, tribal, slave, civil rights, and the tribal Africans were faceless savages in huts other savages would tie up in ropes and sell to shiny white explorers with big glorious guns, the slaves were a handful of paintings and photos of sad looking black people whining about how tough life was until they were forgotten to revel in the bloodiness of the civil war, and all that leaves is Martin Luther King and Rosa Parks to represent civil rights, usually in some kind of segue to how amazing Gandhi was. Occasionally we get something more in the form of a James Brown or Selma Biopic, but most of the time it's white imitation rappers, Ryan Gosling "saving" Jazz, and generally people getting shot by police for being black and then black athletes getting threatened for not being hunky dory with there people getting shot. So yeah, great to know there is a black upper class that's mostly f@#$%ed in the head, but you know what would have been better, a good reason to care about literally any of it.

I think it is great book telling the true story of black people instead of false bad stories all the time.

I'd seen Mr. Graham years ago on the Oprah Winfrey Show and was inspired to purchase the book. I've seen Graham on several telecast and have grown to appreciate his observations through the lens that he's experienced life. Ironically he was the speaker at my daughters graduation at PACE Uni. 2014 and was even more inspiring. This book give a rare historical look at the Black Upperclass.

This book was written to give America the inside scoop of the "Black Elite of America," something that is rarely shown or heard of. The author begins by introducing us to his whole reasoning behind the book. Graham is a self-professed "Black Elite" and was sparked to write this book after meeting with a very successful, wealthy, and influential African American business man who asked how he should go about ensuring his daughters had a "black experience." You see, this man felt his luxury had only provided his daughters with a white existence as they had lived in a Caucasian neighborhood, gone to predominately Caucasian schools, etc and felt that he had not properly balanced his and his daughters life in both worlds: that of the African Americans and that of the Caucasians.And from here the horse race begins.
Graham gives us the origins of the "Black Elite" which I appreciated as it showed that African-Americans of today came from more than just slaves; they also came from free blacks who had never been enslaved, indentured servants, and immigrants who willingly came to the New World. Another thing I found enjoyable from the book was, the "Black Elite checklist." Each chapter was an item on the list and it basically serves as "this is how you know you're a 'black elite.'" For each item of the list Graham explained the historical background and the significance such as Chapter 3 when he discusses the Black Debutante Balls. I won't go too much into detail here as you can read it yourself, so I'll be moving along. One thing I did seem to notice is that the author provides us with a lot of names that are used repeatedly throughout the book. it just really kept bugging me because I was like, "Do you know anybody else, or is the 'Black Elite' really that freakin' small?!" I don't know it was just something about it. If I had to read about so-in-so one more time I was going to burst! What I really kept wondering while reading this book was, "Is the checklist still relevant?" This book was published in 1999, so, much has changed since then and I personally felt that, if based solely off the "checklist", many African Americans could consider themselves "Black Elite" minus the money. I think it would be really interesting to see Lawrence Graham do a new edition of this book to see how much, if any, has now changed to the "checklist." Okay, so now for the second part of this book. For the second part, Graham breaks down the history of the "Black Elite" in several major cities such as Chicago, Atlanta, Washington D.C., etc. Each city gets its own chapter. I really feel like this entire section of the book was uncalled for. After reading the first two cities, I quickly got bored. I soon started asking myself, "Who cares?" Once again it was all the same people. Even in different cities, the people the author interviewed had connections to previous names mentioned in previous cities. I hate to say it but this part of the book made me really dislike it, so much that I even contemplated not finishing it. Well I didn't exactly not finish it. I just skipped the other cities and went straight to the last chapter: skin color. Now this chapter, I felt, deserved a lot more time then it got. To me, it felt like the author was in a rush to wrap things up and did not get the spotlight it deserved. Basically the chapter discusses the taboo of "passing," meaning a fair complected African American passing as a Caucasian person and choosing to live as a Caucasian. I just felt like this chapter deserved so much more because: one, elite or poor it is something all African Americans have discussed and/or dealt with in their family and two, it is something that many non-African Americans know nothing about. Overall, the book was just okay to me. Would I read it again? Definitely not. Would I suggest it to a friend? Yes. Although it was just okay, I feel this book is very beneficial to anyone who wants to broaden their mind about a certain group of people and expand their knowledge. After all, this book isn't just for African American people, it's for Our Kind of People.

I picked up this book because I was lacking any knowledge of the social class system for Black Americans, but this book is just not it. It's not a neutral review of the black upper class but rather a rose-tinted examination of a class the author is so proud of even if there are people saying things like “Rich, educated white women don’t hang around with middle-class college dropouts, so why should I?” The speaker goes on to defend herself by saying she doesn't want to be pretentious, yeah right, as if anyone wants to be pretentious.

I feel very divided about this, to be honest, on one hand, it's nice to see successful black people but on the other hand, it's sad to see them putting down other blacks to fit in with whites. However, these are largely subjective opinions and should not affect my review.

The writing is monotonous and quickly gets boring and repetitive, there could also be long verbose lists of names that quickly become a blur. In all, the book does help give me an insight into black upper-class life. I just wished it was more balanced perhaps something more like  Class: A Guide Through the American Status System

This was a fascinating read. I think any one of you would find it super-interesting too. Author explains the ins-and-outs of a social group I must confess I was completely un-tuned-into. These well-to-do black families often descended from the children of white masters and their in-house slave help, and therefore were better educated, better treated, healthier, and more familiar with white habits and social norms. Some were even freed and lived as free black people. Their descendants created a tightly-knot social group to both celebrate blackness but also to encourage economic and social prosperity. I confess I skipped the chapters about the black upper class in cities other than Washington, since I wasn’t familiar with the schools, parts of town, neighborhoods, etc. But the one about Washington was extremely interesting. I especially liked reading about the Syphax family, who descended from the Lee-Custis family who owned the Lee-Custis Mansion, aka Arlington House, aka the house that is at the top of the hill of Arlington Cemetery which used to be owned by Robert E. Lee’s family until the Federal Government commandeered it as punishment after the Civil War to act as the final resting place for Union soldiers. Recommended.

Really interesting book! Note, I do not feel comfortable rating it.

I learned a ton about the black upper class from the 1850s - late 1900s. Rather, not merely 'upper class' - only the 'elite'. There were a lot of examples of organizations, etc., that brought about camaraderie, a dedication to helping the community, and encouragement for academic success. It was fascinating to learn about the expectations of being in that class: Cape Cod as the vacation spot, women's social groups, specific denominations of Christianity, etc. At the same time all of these groups were very exclusive (for example, must be a doctor or lawyer to join one of the men's organizations) and invitation only (tearing apart the heart of those not accepted).

I was a little disappointed when the author occasionally referenced terms I was not familiar with, without defining them: the debutante party (kept forgetting to look it up) and the 'paper bag test.. It wasn't until chapters later when the author defined what the paper bag test was (and ACK!)

The themes could be described as community and success...and colorism..