“CLASSICS” can offer us a wealth of knowledge about various aspects such as history, culture, customs, and different literary styles.

However, from this particular book, I have learned that classics CAN ALSO REALLY, REALLY SUCK!!! Before proceeding further, it is important to clarify that when I say this book sucked, I don't mean “it was well written but kinda dry and boring”sucked. No, I mean planets and stars being pulled toward the event horizon of a black hole suckage. In other words, suckage on a grand and towering scale.

Now, to be fair, it should be noted that the book was written in 1764 and is widely regarded as the first ever Gothic novel. This brings to light two things. First, there was at least one really, really crappy book published in the 18th century. Second, as the first gothic novel, it has the additional distinction of being the first gothic novel to really, really suck.

The book revolves around Manfred, the lord of Castle Otranto. As the story commences, Manfred's day takes a really bad turn when his sickly son is crushed by a massive helmet that inexplicably falls on him from above. One might wonder where the giant helmet came from and how it happened to fall. Well, reading the book won't provide any answers.......BECAUSE IT IS NEVER EXPLAINED. It just sort of occurs... which just sort of sucks.

So, anyway, the son's death leads Manfred to believe that an ancient prophecy is coming to fruition. The prophecy states that his ownership of the castle will end “should the owner be grown too large to inhabit it.” [Begin confused look].... I have no clue what that means.

Manfred decides that the best way to avoid the prophecy is to divorce his first wife and marry his dead son's fiancé so that she can give him a proper heir. How having another son fits into stopping the prophecy? I can't tell you...I don't know....I and the baby above are still confused. Manfred tells his first wife the plan, and she basically accepts being pushed aside for a younger woman without a word of protest. Basically, Mr. Walpole thought that portraying the first wife as an extreme doormat was exactly what the story required. Well done, Horace. Great job writing those strong female characters.

After that, the rest of the book is mostly “I want to marry her, but she doesn't want to marry me because she wants to marry him, who wants to marry someone else….and Manfred is a real prick.” That sums it up, except that some more boring stuff happens that really sucks, and there is some chasing, some hiding, a couple of deaths, and some mysterious yet incredibly boring knights from a neighboring kingdom.

In conclusion, Castle of Otranto.......

[Insert appropriate image here]

The Castle of Otranto, penned by Horace Walpole in 1764, holds a significant place in literary history. Walpole, not only the author of this "first" gothic novel, but also a member of Parliament, an art historian, and the 4th Earl of Orford, had a diverse and accomplished life.

Originally published anonymously, The Castle of Otranto claimed on its title page to be a translation "from the Original Italian of Onuphirio Muralto". It's unclear if Walpole truly intended for readers to believe it was a true story, but the thought that anyone might have is rather amusing. This novel encompasses all the elements a Gothic novel should possess: mystery, curses, hidden passages, secret rooms, the supernatural, horror, and, of course, women in distress. It's an absolute delight to read. If I had a "this book was fun" shelf, The Castle of Otranto would surely grace it. In fact, perhaps I should create such a shelf.

The story commences on the wedding day of Conrad, the sickly son of Manfred, the lord of the castle. Tragically for poor Conrad, before he can marry Princess Isabella, a gigantic helmet descends upon him and crushes him. This extremely peculiar manner of death fulfills an ancient prophecy stating that the lordship of Otranto shall pass from the present family when the owner grows "too large to inhabit it". Manfred is distraught, not because he loved Conrad, but because he fears that his son's death预示着 his family line's end. I'm not entirely sure why the lords of castles in those days were so concerned about their "family line" since they would eventually pass away regardless, but they were. Manfred's wife, who loves him and whom he seems to be fond of, has only given him this one weak son and a daughter, Matilda. So, Manfred hatches the rather brilliant idea of divorcing his wife and marrying Princess Isabella himself.

Thus begins a tale of a woman in distress, secret passages, a poor young peasant unjustly condemned to death simply because Manfred is angry at the world, secret love, a sighing portrait, and not just a giant helmet but a giant sword as well. It was highly entertaining, and although the giant helmets and sighing portraits didn't frighten me in the least, even when I read it at night. It's definitely worth reading. Happy Reading.

Written in 1764, you would never guess it. Sarcasm aside, it's a real clanger! I don't very easily DNF books but at 50% I was bored out of my wits! This is the supposed father of gothic literature: set in a castle, with howling in the battlements, damsels in distress and all the medieval checkboxes safely ticked away. But wow, what a boring read!

To be fair to Horace Walpole, the book wasn't actually written by him - it's a translation! - and he did a professional job of successfully interpreting the Italian text. At least that's what I gathered from the intro! Otranto is set in an era when rulers had too much power and could treat their wives like objects. Away to the cloisters m'lady and consider yourself well and truly divorced while I beget myself a tasty new lass. Multiple times. Ancient and chauvinistic are the most horrifying aspects of this book.

I have no idea what to make of the fantastical 'horror' elements either. Gigantic helmets, swords and boots! There must be a jolly giant hiding away in the belfry? Characters spend more time throwing indignant fits than fighting any terror. Romeo and Juliet gone all wrong with angry randy viscounts.

I read this book to better acquaint myself with gothic horror and its history. There are allusions to Don Quixote (there's something weirdly pompous about it). Carmilla/Dracula. Edgar Allan Poe. Henry VIII and his misogynistic hips. Shirley Jackson (who is great). This is the epitome of gothnicity (I made that word up) but so dour to read. Gothic literature had to start somewhere and here it is, but you don't need to go here and make the same mistake as me. A really good book for getting back to sleep in the early hours of the morning. I slept like a rock!

Somewhere in the north of England, between the era of the First Crusade in 1095 and 1243, the date of the last, in an old castle called Otranto, the story unfolds. Conrad, the 15-year-old son and only heir of Otranto's prince, Manfred, is tragically killed by the helmet of a statue of the previous prince, Alfonso. On that very day, Conrad was set to marry Princess Isabelle. With no other heir and desperate to save his lordship, Manfred devises a plan to divorce his wife, Hipollita, and offer himself as Isabelle's husband. She refuses, and what follows is a thrilling hide-and-seek game within the gothic and scary walls of Otranto.

First published in 1764, two hundred years before my birth, this novel is regarded as the first true gothic fiction. Gothic fiction, as defined by Wikipedia, combines elements of both horror and romance. Having the opportunity to read the very book that initiated this genre is truly remarkable. Without it, there might not have been the more popular works by Bram Stoker, Daphne de Maurier, or my favorite, Edgar Allan Poe.

This is Mr. Walpole's sole novel. It is short, consisting of only 115 pages, and has a fast pace. There is a lengthy introduction and two prefaces for the first and second editions. What intrigued me was the knowledge that, fearing the genre might not sell, Mr. Walpole initially claimed the manuscript was found in an ancient library of a catholic family, suggesting he wasn't the author. In another edition, perhaps after the first printing was successful, he stated that the whole story was his dream or hallucination. If only he could have known that over 200 years later, people would still be reading his book, as it is part of renowned lists such as "1001 Books You Must Read Before You Die" and "501 Must Read Books." After all, it started a genre. How many books can boast of creating a new literary genre?
There is a warning not to read this book at night, as it is said to keep you awake and scared. However, perhaps I am too old for such fears, and the El Nino heat is more likely to keep me awake than having nightmares.